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Jokes

Looking for a laugh? There are plenty of funny jokes being told on The AnswerBank, so sit back, relax and have a read.

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Spicerack
A Priest, a Rabbit and an Imam turn up at the blood bank together. 'Excuse me, Rabbit' said the nurse, 'Do you know which blood group you are'? ' I think' said the Rabbit 'I must be a type O'....
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Rondy
We got lucky when we heard the old Cross Lanes Hotel was closing and its beautiful maple doors became available for sale as salvage items. We bought several and had them installed in our 19th-century...
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Bobbisox1
https://ibb.co/MZdfrbJ...
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-SharonA-
I have just quit my job at the cat shelter. I had no choice as they reduced meowers!!...
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Canary42
The South Downs aren't just funny. They're hill areas.
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Rondy
Four Catholic ladies are having coffee together, discussing how important their children are. The first one tells her friends, "my son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him...
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Patsy33
I accidently drank a bottle of disappearing ink. I'm now sat in A&E waiting to be seen......
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Chipchopper
"I think people who sell meat for a living are absolutely disgusting" said one shopper to another. "Well, in their defence" said the other shopper, "I think those who sell vegetables are grocer"...
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Stickybottle
who corrected the grammar in one of my jokes last week I think fewer of you ! Lol...
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Jomlett
What do you call a woman who sets fire to all her bills? Bernadette....
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Ken4155
Guy takes his girlfriend home after a date and they share a passionate kiss on her doorstep. He can tell she is getting aroused, so he confidently leans against the wall nd says, "Can i take your...
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Rondy
A blonde girl was going on her first date and her grandmother gave her some advice: "The boy may try to kiss you -- it will feel good, but don't do it. He may try to go up your skirt -- but don't let...
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Rondy
Two young men were flying a small plane over the desert when the engine failed and they crashed. Wandering for days one young man says: "I'm so hungry I'm going to chop off my penis and eat it." "No,...
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Rondy
"Flight Easy jet LL147 Please turn right 45 degrees for noise abatement." Advised the control tower. "Roger." The pilot responded. "But we are flying at 35.000 feet, How much noise can we be making up...
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Chipchopper
What do you call a cyclist who wears a hollowed out pumpkin on his head for a crash helmet ?. Gourdon...
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Rondy
Two gay gentlemen are walking through a zoo. They come across the gorillas and after a while they notice that the male gorilla has a massive erection. The gay men are fascinated by this. One of the...
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Canary42
https://ibb.co/7rCMbVY...
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Canary42
I heard about a new children's adventure story featuring Pavlov's dogs and Schrödinger's cat so I went to the library to see if I could borrow it. The librarian said it rang a bell, but she didn't...
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Rondy
"Did you hear about that American actress who got stabbed?" "No, who was it?" "I don't know, Reese something or other." "Witherspoon?" "No I believe it was with a knife."...
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stocksman
I ordered a metal scribing tool from internet which said ''the tungsten tip will NEVER go dull''.So why did they feel the need to make it double ended ?

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