Animals & Nature0 min ago
Tom: Humans are so primitive they eat more bananas than monkeys. Harry: I've never eaten a monkey in my life.
I found this on the menu at the local cafe - idemx rilgl.
I asked the waitress 'What is it?'
She said 'Mixed grill' ___ North Korea now have a missile that can reach New York, and if it can make it... ...
I asked the waitress 'What is it?'
She said 'Mixed grill' ___ North Korea now have a missile that can reach New York, and if it can make it... ...
What do you call someone who delivers Indian Food?. A currier. I stupidly... ...
A man and a woman are seated next to each other on a flight. They start eyeing each other, and both realize they want to do the same thing. He slips a condom out of his pocket, and she looks... ...
It is rumoured that Manchester United Football Club have failed to gain £143 million of sponsorship from a pet food company.
Evidently they couldn't live up to 'Winalot'
Evidently they couldn't live up to 'Winalot'
I’ve just found out that a few months ago the pound shop has been taken over by the 99p shop, it took a while for the penny to drop. ___ I was walking along the beach this morning singing puppet on... ...
I went to the library in search of book about Native American tribes, so I asked the Liberian if she could help me find it, and she said "do you have the authors name ?" I said I think it was... ...
I went to McDonalds today, it was tipping down with rain.
He said what can I get you?
I said a Big Mac please. ___ Paddy goes into a John Lewis department store and asks the shopkeeper, "Excuse me... ...
He said what can I get you?
I said a Big Mac please. ___ Paddy goes into a John Lewis department store and asks the shopkeeper, "Excuse me... ...
Nobody laughed. It turns out I'm not even remotely funny.
While browsing my local bookshop, I came across a book called How to Solve 50% of Your Problems. So I bought two.
The owner of the tailor's shop kept hovering over me while I was browsing, so I asked him to leave me alone. He said, "Fine, suit yourself."
Yesterday was National Awareness Day....
I didn't know that. ___ I found a Load of Zips and Buttons Dumped on my front lawn this morning..
Someone's been Fly Tipping. ___ Two blokes trapped in a cave,... ...
I didn't know that. ___ I found a Load of Zips and Buttons Dumped on my front lawn this morning..
Someone's been Fly Tipping. ___ Two blokes trapped in a cave,... ...
It was the Gold Medal Wrestling Match between the Irishman and American. The Irish wrestlers corner man told his wrestler that the American had never lost a match and was famous for his Pretzel... ...
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A policeman in full riot gear and taking on the protestors in Plymouth's Guildhall Square suddenly throws his shield down and starts running and running as if he was in a blind panic. Up the... ...
ज़िंदगी के खास दिन को मनाएं heartfelt birthday wishes के साथ! खोजें वो बेहतरीन शब्द जो किसी के जन्मदिन को और भी खास बना दें! ✨ चाहे वो रोमांटिक अंदाज़ में birthday wishes in hindi... ...
ज़िंदगी के खास दिन को मनाएं heartfelt birthday wishes के साथ! खोजें वो बेहतरीन शब्द जो किसी के जन्मदिन को और भी खास बना दें! ✨ चाहे वो रोमांटिक अंदाज़ में birthday wishes in hindi... ...
Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."
Paul Hamm, Gymnast: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and... ...
Paul Hamm, Gymnast: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and... ...
My mate said to me: "Do you like wearing that hi vis jacket all the time?"
I said: "I wouldn’t be seen without it !!" ___ If my name was David and I had a boy, I would have to name him Harley.
That... ...
I said: "I wouldn’t be seen without it !!" ___ If my name was David and I had a boy, I would have to name him Harley.
That... ...
Portly pensioner Pete was shocked when he saw the state of his latest bank balance, and demanded to his long-suffering wife. "What the heck have you been doing with all that grocery money I gave... ...
