I went into a caravan showroom the other day and said to the salesman: "I'd like to buy a motorhome." He said "Camper?" I said "Oooo, get you, I'd like to buy a motorhome, sweety." ___ "What am I going... ...
....heard from a mate, he has a date from a girl who identifies as a wheelie bin. The trouble is, he can't remember if he's taking her out Thursday or Friday.
My grandson loves the jokes of this form... Q: What do you call a man with a car on his head? A: Jack I have several but you get the idea, looking for ones I don't know.
I looked out of my window and saw some guy in my garden, he was wearing a baseball cap, tennis shoes and a rugby shirt. I shouted to him, what's your game ??
A lady of the night was visiting her doctor for a regular checkup. "Any specific problems you should tell me about?" the doctor asked. "Well, I have noticed lately that if I get even the tiniest... ...
I was having a drink in the mermaid inn last night, when I overheard a woman say "I like to lay on the beach, myself but my other half likes to be in the sea"
I was in a shoe shop yesterday, trying on a new pair of shoes, an assistant asked me how I was doing, so I told her they was too tight. She said, "try them with the tongue out" I said " iths no... ...
I got my face slapped by the new girl at work today. I only asked If she spits or swallows. It seems like a reasonable question, being as we are both wine tasters. ___ A thief broke into my house... ...
Two little boys were at a wedding service, One boy leaned over and asked his friend ,"How many wives can a man have?" " Sixteen" came back the reply. "Four richer,four poorer ,four better and four... ...
I borrowed a blind friend of mine £20 the other day, He promised me he would pay me back the next time he saw me. Uh Oh, I should have known better. ___ My wife left me for another man. All that lies... ...
I woke up this morning to the sun coming through my bedroom window. I need to have a word with that new paper boy. ___ A father came home from a long business trip to find his son riding a very fancy... ...
My wife and l decided we would never go to bed annoyed at each other. We've been sitting up since Tuesday. ___ Just went into the shop and said "Can I pay by card? He said "No problem, what card do... ...
Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren't enough rooms, so they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night, the guy on the right wakes up and says, "I had this wild, vivid dream of... ...
An old, tired-looking dog wandered into a man’s yard. He could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was well taken care of. The dog calmly came over to the man and he gave... ...
I write to bring to your notice that the International Monetary Funds (IMF) has selected your email address among the Scam victims listed to be Compensated of $300, 000.00 ( Three Hundred Thousand... ...