Rondy Member Profile in The AnswerBank

Rondy

And There's More

Kathy goes to her local bank, walks into the manager’s office, and says, “I want a loan; I am going to divorce my husband.”
“Oh, we don’t give loans for divorces,” the manager says. “We offer loans... ...

Rondy

A Few More

The wife told me the cat needed to be chipped. I only had a 9 iron but I still got it well over the shed.

***************** I was on a panel for prospective jury duty. The first lawyer came across... ...

Rondy

And There's More

I've finally found the courage to open the first door on my Oscar Pistorius advent calendar! _____ My wife told me that I twist everything she says to my advantage…
I take that as a... ...

Rondy

Sunday Evening Fun Quiz

QUIZ of the week starts at 6pm https://stin.to/f0blx# ...

Rondy

And There's More

I was standing in a queue behind a very big fat woman with a huge ***. When her phone started to bleep, a little boy behind her shouted: "Watch out, she's reversing." ___ Jesus Christ was... ...

Rondy

Holiday Plans

Advice needed please. I'm lucky enough to be on holiday from Dec 26th to Jan 15th and would love to go to a quiet beach, without crowds, preferably in the Caribbean or Indian Ocean. Ideally a child... ...

Rondy

And There's More

Scientists got bored after watching the Earth turn after 24 hours.
So they called it a day.
___
I wrote a book about an amazing basement.
.It was a best cellar.
___
I ordered a Hans Solo steak at a... ...

Rondy

Airport

I was at the airport the other day and a bloke fainted face down on the baggage carousel….. He came around eventually.

Rondy

There's More

Wife asked me why the fridge was full of stir fry!
I told her I must have been sleep wokking aagain. ___ Which girl is best at keeping a secret?
Chantelle. ___ I'm not going back to the gym.
First... ...

Rondy

And There's More

Me: I can't see my penis because my stomach is so big.
Doctor: You should diet.
Me: Okay but what colour! ___ I got onto a plane at the airport this morning and it had an aisle that went on for ages....

Rondy

There's More

My boss said to me: "Why do you come out in a rash when I give you your wages?"
I said: "It's because I'm allergic to peanuts!" ___ Stupid driver next to me is putting on makeup!
I was so shocked I... ...

Rondy

Microwave

Fancied a microwave ready meal for lunch and it said pierce film in several places. So far I’ve been to Prestatyn, Rhyl, Llandudno and now on my way to Anglesey and still haven’t eaten. How many... ...

Rondy

There's More

I was going to cook a surprise Korean meal for the wife today.
But someone let the cat out of the bag! ___ Went to see a fortune teller last week and she told me a lot of money would be coming my... ...

Rondy

And There's More

I'm developing a new method of air crew training.
It's just a pilot scheme at the moment. ___ I watched a series about a tennis bribery scandal.
It was on Net fix. ___ I’m going to a deodorant party... ...

Rondy

Sunday Evening Fun Quiz

Tonight's quiz link below. Staring at 6pm (British time) https://stin.to/f0blx# ...

Rondy

There's More

Last Christmas I got my wife some I speak your weight scales.
She got on them & it said "1 person at a time" ___ Do I like to make maths-related jokes?
Sum times. ___ Police were suspicious when the... ...

Rondy

And There's More

I have been teaching my dog to fetch tools from my workshop…
He's not perfect, but he knows the drill!
___

For my age I have a lot going for me…
My eyes are going, my knees are going, my back is... ...

Rondy

There's More

Please be very careful on the roads over the Christmas period!
A lot of men will be drinking and allowing their wives to drive .
___

If the world's population where to hold hands along the equator a... ...

Rondy

And There's More

I collect a lot things related to antique implements of torture and execution, so when a French guillotine basket turned up for auction, naturally I was interested.
However, when it came to the... ...

Rondy

There's More

I‘m moving to Greece, should I take my Sky dish with me or just smash it on the floor?
___

Went to the Dr the other day because I’ve started growing a tail,my feet are forming into trotters,I can’t... ...

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And There's More

A Few More

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Sunday Evening Fun Quiz

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Holiday Plans

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Airport

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Microwave

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Sunday Evening Fun Quiz

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And There's More

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And There's More

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