Rondy Member Profile in The AnswerBank

Rondy

And There's More

An ice-cream van has crashed on the M56 - police have put cones out! ___ Was queuing up for tickets to a ska group gig and someone pushed in.

Bad Manners. ___

Rondy

Beware of an online survey reputedly from the Magic Circle.
They’re all trick questions! ___ Just had to tell my kids we can’t afford to take them to Disneyland, but I did promise to take lots of... ...

Rondy

A Few More

A police officer rings into his station: "I'm at this house sergeant, the one where a woman has shot her husband for walking on the floor that she'd just mopped."

"Ok, constable, have you arrested... ...

Rondy

And There's More

"I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday. He later told me it was the most violent book he’d ever read." ___ My girlfriend’s dog died, so I bought her another, identical one. She... ...

Rondy

There's More

That storm Isha is so violent. I phoned the landlord this morning.
I said "It's about our roof."
He said "What about it?"
"We'd like it back!!" ___ I haven’t tried yoga, but I have tried bending over... ...

Rondy

Sunday Evening Fun Quiz

QUIZ of the week starts at 6pm (British time) Tonight. It's all free to enter and only takes about 20 minutes. https://stin.to/f0blx# ...

Rondy

There's More

A waiter places a warm cup in front of the gentleman. The gentleman takes a sip and spits it out.
He turns to the waiter and says, “Waiter! This coffee tastes like mud!”
The waiter, looking... ...

Rondy

A Few More

A Yorkshireman's beloved wife passed away. He went to a stonemason to sort out a headstone for her grave. Being a devout man, he decided the inscription should read, 'She was thine'. The... ...

Rondy

Blonde

As a trucker stops at a red traffic light, a blonde catches up.
She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door.
The trucker lowers the window, and she says "Hi, my name is... ...

Rondy

A Few More

I went to buy a digital watch and the guy tried to sell me an analogue one. I said to him, "What is this, a wind up?" ___ My wife asked me what see should do with this bubble wrap? I said just pop... ...

Rondy

There's More

My friend was in Canada and was attacked by a huge bear…
I'll spare you the grizzly details! ___ Spent all day horse riding…
It was great until I ran out of 50p coins! ___ I haven't renewed my... ...

Rondy

Party In The Woods

Two young guys were at a party in the woods with some friends, all drinking beer, when all of a sudden there was a tremendous storm with lots of thunder and rain.
The two of them ran through the... ...

Rondy

And There's More

They said on tv this morning that 20% of all driving accidents are cause by drunk drivers. That means that the other 80% are caused by drivers that are stone cold sober.
In other words If all... ...

Rondy

Sunday Evening Fun Quiz

QUIZ of the week is tonight at 6pm. (British time) https://stin.to/f0blx# ...

Rondy

There's More

I’ve learned 99% of the English language.
I’m almost their. ___ I walked into a bank, pointed a long, thin piece of wood at the ceiling and shouted:
"This is a stick up!" ___ Yesterday I went rock... ...

Rondy

They Keep Coming

A bill collector knocked on the door of a country debtor.

"Is Fred home"? he asked the woman who answered the door.

"Sorry," the woman replied. "Fred's gone for cotton."

The next day, the collector... ...

Rondy

And There's More

Remember back in the days when your TV wouldn't work, you would bang it a few times?I tried that with my dishwasher, but she ended up pregnant. ___ Paddy pulls up at the traffic lights next to a... ...

Rondy

A Few More

You're welcome to drive out from Cairo and visit the Pyramids - when you arrive at the car park just toot and come in. ___ This guy walks into the local bar one Friday afternoon when he gets out of... ...

Rondy

And There's More

Both my mates are called William Hill - what are the odds! ___ I asked a librarian if they had any books on 'Different noise levels'.
The librarian said: "Sure!! What volume would you like?" ___ Who... ...

Rondy

A Few More

Accidentally took the cats medicine this morning...don't ask meow.
___

A small church had a very attractive big-busted organist named Linda. Her breasts were so large that they bounced and jiggled... ...

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And There's More

There's More

A Few More

And There's More

There's More

Sunday Evening Fun Quiz

There's More

A Few More

Blonde

A Few More

There's More

Party In The Woods

And There's More

Sunday Evening Fun Quiz

There's More

They Keep Coming

And There's More

A Few More

And There's More

A Few More

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