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McMouse

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McMouse

Larry's in room 232 at the hospital.

Ok, you are asking who in the hell is 'Larry'. Larry gets home late one night and, Linda, his wife says, 'Where in the hell have you been? 'Larry replies, 'I was out getting a tattoo. ''A tattoo?'...
12:31 Mon 29th Jun 20091 answer, last by bernie6969 17:04 Mon 29th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Subject: Fw: International Survey

Last month a world-wide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was:- "Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?" The...
12:29 Mon 29th Jun 20093 answers, last by puternut 12:02 Mon 06th Jul 2009
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McMouse

Perfect Defence

Defense Attorney: What is your age? Little Old Woman: I am 86 years old. Defense Attorney: On the first day of April last year, will you tell us, in your own words, what happened to you? Little Old...
17:00 Fri 12th Jun 20091 answer, last by marval 18:18 Fri 12th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Joining the Eurozone

In order to meet the conditions for joining the Single European currency, all citizens of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland must be made aware that the phrase "Spending a penny"...
16:53 Fri 12th Jun 20092 answers, last by another-view 16:55 Fri 12th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Good news and bad news.

Woman phones up her husband at work for a chat. HIM: "I'm sorry dear but I'm up to my neck in work today." HER: "But I've got some good news and some bad news for you dear." HIM: "OK darling, but as...
14:07 Thu 11th Jun 20091 answer, last by squarebear 14:08 Thu 11th Jun 2009
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McMouse

If time heals all wounds,

Why have I still got a belly-button?
13:52 Thu 11th Jun 20095 answers, last by DEN53 14:17 Thu 11th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Bed and breakfast

A man books into a hotel for the night. In the morning he calls room-service and requests a newspaper and a cup of tea. Ten minutes later a young woman enters his room and gives him the paper and tea,...
13:43 Thu 11th Jun 20091 answer, last by carlton23 00:53 Fri 12th Jun 2009
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McMouse

One night stand

One morning a woman was walking out of her front door, when she notices a strange little man at the bottom of her garden. "You're a goblin," she says, "I caught you and you owe me three wishes!". So...
12:35 Thu 11th Jun 20091 answer, last by marval 20:30 Thu 11th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Vacancy: Telepath.

You know where to apply.
12:28 Thu 11th Jun 2009
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McMouse

If all good things eventually come to an end.....

.......when will I know they've started?
11:41 Thu 11th Jun 20093 answers, last by CARABINT 12:38 Thu 11th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Oh no!

When Leif Ericson returned from his New World voyage, he found that his name had been dropped from the registry of his hometown. He reported the omission to the chief town official who, deeming it a...
18:30 Wed 10th Jun 20092 answers, last by johnny7 21:21 Wed 10th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Every little helps

My local supermarket did a demo making Swedish dill bread. After mixing all the ingredients the baker said "and for our next step we will knead the dill dough...."
17:58 Wed 10th Jun 20096 answers, last by Aprilis 23:13 Wed 10th Jun 2009
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McMouse

A Fairy Tale

A young guy from Missouri moves to Florida and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job. The Manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?" The kid says "Yeah. I...
17:22 Wed 10th Jun 20091 answer, last by marval 17:49 Wed 10th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Are you ready?

Nelson Mandela is at home watching TV when there is a knock at the door. A Japanese deliveryman is clutching a clipboard, pointing to a truck full of car exhausts in the driveway and yelling: "you...
12:05 Wed 10th Jun 20091 answer, last by marval 13:18 Wed 10th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Wednesday groaner

Once upon a time in England, a very mean witch was terrorizing the local population. They finally went to a wizard to see what could be done about her. The wizard gave them a potion that would turn...
11:56 Wed 10th Jun 20091 answer, last by marval 13:17 Wed 10th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Is a hangover

the wrath of grapes?
14:01 Tue 09th Jun 20091 answer, last by steg 16:02 Tue 09th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Superman

Clark and Lois had been going out, unofficially, for a number of years by now. Walking home from the theater one night, they were passing the graveyard. Lois, still looking for a bit more in their...
13:48 Tue 09th Jun 20093 answers, last by Postdog 20:39 Tue 09th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Driving along

A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye. It reads: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 10 MILES He thinks it was just a figment...
13:32 Tue 09th Jun 20092 answers, last by piggynose 15:05 Sun 04th Apr 2010
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McMouse

Just like real life

All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was the one in charge. "I should be in charge," said the brain, "because I run all the systems, so without me nothing would...
20:20 Mon 08th Jun 2009
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McMouse

Just like real life

All the organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was the one in charge. "I should be in charge," said the brain, "because I run all the systems, so without me nothing would...
16:56 Mon 08th Jun 20091 answer, last by marval 22:58 Mon 08th Jun 2009

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