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McMouse

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McMouse
A sperm donor, a carpenter, and Julius Ceasar walk into a bar. He came, he saw, he conquered....
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McMouse
I asked the butcher for some tripe. He gave me a box set of ‘Love Island’...
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McMouse
What did the chemistry teacher say after getting two whiffs of helium? He He...
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McMouse
The scariest things about WW3 is UK is on the same side as Germany. They don’t have a good record with wars....
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McMouse
Knock knock. Who’s there? To. To who? No. To whom....
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McMouse
An Roman walks into a bar and asks for a Martinus. Barman says “do you mean a Martini” Guy replies “if I’d wanted a double I’d have said”...
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McMouse
I wanted to do a joke about tools but awl I could think of was this.
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McMouse
I used to date a twin and people would ask how I knew which was which. I said it was easy because by girlfriend had a cute mole behind her left ear and her brother had a beard....
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McMouse
I visited a psychic and rang the bell. She yelled out “who is it” I didn’t bother...
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McMouse
A Time Traveller walked into the bar.
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McMouse
The barman said “we don’t serve Time Travellers in here”...
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McMouse
A married couple is lying in bed. The wife leans over and says, "I want you to say dirty things before we start". So the man starts to caress her neck and whispers to here. "Living room, Bathroom,...
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McMouse
Husband comes home and says: - Honey, I invited a friend to have dinner with us today. Screaming she replies: - What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I did not buy any groceries, the dishes are...
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McMouse
Historically disgraced military officers accepted a loaded revolver from a brother officer and retired to their room. Is such a practice appropriate today?...
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McMouse
If anything’s possible, what’s important?...
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McMouse
Visit a Buddhist monetary and ask the first monk they meet “What’s going Om?”...
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McMouse
Wong phones his boss at Chinese takeaway and says “I no come work today because I depressed.” Boss replies “when I’m depressed I just throw my wife on the bed and have sex until I feel better. You try...
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McMouse
Walks up to a pub bar and asks “is this stool taken?”...
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McMouse
> Enter new password ~ Chicken > Password must include a capital ~ Chickenkiev...
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McMouse
Because they have little anty-bodies.

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