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Mad over Fifties Club

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ladyalex | 19:59 Sat 21st May 2011 | Quizzes & Puzzles
162 Answers
The Club is now Open
Good evening and welcome everyone.
How wonderful it is to return to dear old Blighty after a short sojourn in foreign parts.
Lordalex and I have had a restful holiday but we are always glad to return home to roost in our own home which has been so lovingly looked after by our ancient retainers.

The wine cellar seems a little depleted, but worry not, dear friends, we are expecting a new shipment very soon, so no need to hold back on the tailcocks.

I do hope that all went well during our absence and that there were no incidents involving the emergency services. (I have not had time to access the minute book.)

We have brought back with us several treats for the raffle:

A string of garlic
A stripey jersey
A beret
A tin of escargots (within date)

I look forward to tonight's talk, which I believe to be entitled :
'Lancashire Peelers, what are they for ?'
or was it
'Lancashire Heelers, what are they ?'
Time will tell, no doubt.
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nice to see you back lady alex,mamyalyne has been doing a fine job,for the raffle i have brought a map of london,since i live in scotland,a pkt of askits with 2 unopened,a clay pipe and half a bottle of cherryade
Question Author
Welcome, slinky. It is wonderful to be back. Thank you so much for the raffle prizes.
How many opened askits do you have ?
oh. did you enjoy your holiday in china lady ? i see the hint from your ruffle prizes ? hi kate.
good evening,glad you are both well rested,hope Lordalex was well behaved!
what do the Peelers peel? bells or their clothes? I am now back ,just about,to rude health,spent 5 days @ her majestys' pleasure,sorry YD hospital,swellings gone down,Docs couln't find any other body parts so sent me home,but now looking for my parents' dog(stolen).Have a few bed pans for raffle
Lady - this is my first visit - but noticed how well tanned you are looking, so had to follow you home
Question Author
How clever of you , annesquiffy.....and welcome to you
Raffle prizes from the deepest Southwest include:

A piece of Cambrian basalt rock to represent the beginning of the world

A lump of Vesuvian magna to represent the continued birth of the earth

A sample of Ayres Rock to sate you Aborigines amongs us ABers

A stone hammer to hit that Snag of a US evangelist that came up with this

A half eaten piece of Blackpool rock to represent - I have no idea?

An old LP, heavily scratched of Deep Purple in Rock

A one way ticket to Rock in Devon as no one ever gets out of Devon as they are too rat-arsed on their weak Cider

A half empty Cider bottle from Devon, tossed over the count border into Dorrrset

A half empty bottle of champagne drunk at 5.45pm tonight

A half full condom to represent the last act on earth to counter Adam and Eve

A letter to Richard Branson asking him to take you to the Moon to seek out some of their Rock as a souvenir.

Good Evening Y'all; we are still here, well to 6pm US Central Time tonight.
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Peetal, how lovely to see you ....I did not know you had been poorly. All healed up now, I hope.....no further oozing ?

Tony V , you are most welcome. Have you been vetted ?
Good evening Milady, just back from setting out this weeks comestibles , the guest tailcock of the week is The Golden Star*

For the raffle I have

an Alice band
3 velcro rollers
can of Bellair Hairspray
Book of matches
Question Author
Hello , DT
I think you may be off your rocker...
But thank you for allthe raffle prizes

(Aside....the charity shops will be laughing on Monday)
fine now thank you,but only a quick broomstick ride tonight,off to a bithday do,
only food I have to place on table is my cheese and onion sandwich, I've only taken a small bite from it. As for raffle will have to be resourceful my lady
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Hello, Mamya. So pleased to see you again after all this time.

A Golden Star* would be most agreeable.

As we are all still here, can we take it that the world has not ended yet ?
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Even a short visit from you is a pleasure, Petal...and often a mystery.

Tony V thank you for the sandwich, I'm sure Mamyalynne will incorporate it in the goodies.
evening milady and all x

It's nice to see you're back (and you're front as well, please pardon the lack of manners)

Mamya and I have been at the same hare saloon, I have a half pack of kirby grips for the raffle.

The nettle soup I wouldn't inflict on anyone
Think the world is still rotating
Question Author
Welcome, Alba and thank you so much for the raffle prizes.
Hope I win the Alice Band.

Nettle soup sounds a bit rash.
If I am off my rocker then spare some of the poor inmates around here. I will have a sip of Spanish protest wine, harsh and way too (much) left and get back on my rocker......
Question Author
But how can we tell, Tony ?
How would we know if the Rapture has been and got us...or missed us ?
I think DT was in next ward to me,

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