I Went To

marval | 22:06 Fri 03rd Aug 2018 | Jokes

3 Answers

I went to a restaurant that served endangered species and ordered a Panda steak. The waiter asked, “How would you like that sir?” I said, “Rare.”

I called the reception at the dentist to re-arrange the date of my next appointment. I am now booked in for Rifday 71st Cedember at 9am.

Good things come to those who… (Will post rest of this joke in one year)

I am a daredevil. I steal biscuits from babies. I’m a bit of a rusk taker.

As I stood on the tube this morning I thought to myself, “My pringles are getting crushed.”

I used to work in a boomerang factory, in the returns department.

When I was young my best friend was a paper boy. I was a very lonely child.

I broke into the International Tall People’s Society Headquarters. All the alarms were raised.

I got into a fight last night and the guy pulled a razor out. He would have used it too, if he had found somewhere to plug it in.

I am permanently hooked up to a device which gives me an electric shock if I say something negative. It is not ideal, but I can’t complain.