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Patsy33

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Patsy33
At my wife's labour, the nurse came up to me and my wife and said, "How about Epidural Anaesthesia?" I said, "Thanks, but we've already picked a name."...
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Patsy33
People walked out of the Spice Girls concert last night because of dreadful sound problems. A sound engineer has been sacked for causing the issues. He turned the Mic's on....
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Patsy33
I had the map of Italy tattooed on my chest. I've got really sore Naples...
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Patsy33
When Lord Nelson died, he was 5 feet tall. His statue in London is 15 feet tall. That's Horatio of 3:1.
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Patsy33
I use to think that sticks and stones can break my bones, but words could never hurt me. Until I fell into a printing press..
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Patsy33
Husband has been getting aching, lower right side of back. Also, pain in groin, same side. Peeing more often too. Been going on for over week. Any ideas sqad? Thanks.
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Patsy33
Why are you single, I've been asked. "You're intelligent, attractive, caring and creative" I reply, "I'm over qualified"...
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Patsy33
With the women's football going on, what would could be an alternative to, 'Man of The Match?' Some one suggested, Best Biitch on the Pitch..... Lol ( not one I would choose)...
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Patsy33
I don't understand how a cemetery can raise the cost of funerals and blame it on the cost of living!...
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Patsy33
A big thank you to my neighbour, for allowing me to borrow a big plastic covering sheet. Ta Pauline....
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Patsy33
Four teenage brothers performs this classic. Great job!... https://youtu.be/RnutiUHWo00...
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Patsy33
You can tell a lot from a woman's actions. If she has her hands tightly around your neck, she's probably slightly angry :-)
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Patsy33
I’m not saying the queues at A&E were bad...but there was a guy in there with a particularly nasty musket wound......
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Patsy33
Went to the cinema today. I bought popcorn, lemonade and sweets. I said to lady serving, "I'm ever so sorry, I've only got a £50 note". She said, "That's ok, put the sweets back"...
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Patsy33
I swallowed a piece of my new chess set. It tasted horrible! So I took it back to shop. I told manager it tasted awful, he said, "What do you mean? I said, "It's stale mate" He said, "Don't be so...
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Patsy33
My friend asked what was the secret of our happy marriage. I replied, "Chemistry, I take Prozac and husband takes Valium"....
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Patsy33
My dad's sister walked into the room spinning around. I though to myself, "Oh my giddy Aunt!".....
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Patsy33
A chicken came up to me and asked if I'd seen her eggs. I told her she'd probably mislaid them.....
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Patsy33
Have any ladies on here had a hysteroscopy? If so, did you have it done under general anaesthetic? Got to have one soon and am feeling very anxious....
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Patsy33
I took part in the sun tanning Olympics. I got bronze.

1 to 20 of 1423

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