Donate SIGN UP

Patsy33

21 to 40 of 1932

First Previous 1 2 3 4 5 Next Last

Avatar Image
Patsy33
Wife: I'm going shopping, do you need anything? Husband: I'm looking for inner-peace and happiness, an answer to my doubts, a sense of fulfilment, a medium through which I can transcend... ...
Avatar Image
Patsy33
Burnt my Hawaiian pizza today…Should have cooked it on aloha temperature.
Avatar Image
Patsy33
My 5, going on 6 year old grandson, is in his Christmas play at school tomorrow. The school doesn't do the  traditional stuff, but always make it fun. He told me he is the Narrator. "Oh", says I,... ...
Avatar Image
Patsy33
I was in Superdrug a few days, and asked if they had any cream for chilblains. I was told no, I'd have to go to Pharmacy. So I went along to Boots, where there was a long queue. The woman in front... ...
Avatar Image
Patsy33
Less than a week ago, I applied for a new passport. I was nicely surprised when it turned up this morning after 6 days! A friend of my OH told us to expect at least 9 weeks. So pleased I done it... ...
Avatar Image
Patsy33
  A pantomime horse walks into a bar. The barman says ‘Fancy a pint?’ The horse says ‘No, two halves, thanks.’
Avatar Image
Patsy33
My wife left me due to my obsession with football. We've been married for 15 seasons..
Avatar Image
Patsy33
I'm going to apply fir a renewed passport online later. When putting photo code in, I need to have it sent to my email. The thing is, mine is messed up and I can't use. Is it alright to use my... ...
Avatar Image
Patsy33
I've just bought a wonderful piece of kitchen equipment that plays Nocturne No. 2 in E flat when it's used.
Yes, I've got a new Chopin board.
Avatar Image
Patsy33
Anyone watching this black comedy? We've watched 5 episodes so far. I think it's so good. Great writing and characters, like Daisy Haggard and Tchéky Karyo, just to name a few. Quite funny at times,... ...
Avatar Image
Patsy33
I put vaseline on our front doorknob as a joke. My wife didn't find it funny. In fact she flew off the handle.
Avatar Image
Patsy33
Well after much consideration, I ordered this Gtech Multi vacuum, mainly fir stairs. Used it today and I'm very pleased with it so far. Got £38 off as it was Black Friday deal. 😃
Avatar Image
Patsy33
My friend decided to get a face tattoo of his favourite Star Wars character. You should've seen the Luke on his face..  
Avatar Image
Patsy33
If you have a breakdown in an electric car you can still use the AA.   However if it’s a small electric car you have to use the AAA.
Avatar Image
Patsy33
A man claiming he is Jesus is brought into a mental hospital... He is asked, "Why do you think you are Jesus?"
He replies, "God told me so!"
Immediately, the patient behind him stands up and shouts,... ...
Avatar Image
Patsy33
I'm looking to buy a handheld vacuum cleaner for stairs, and there is so many to choose from. Can anyone recommend a good one for me? Thanks.
Avatar Image
Patsy33
Why was Billy Joel's laundry still wet? 🎵'He didnt start the drier'🎵
Avatar Image
Patsy33
This song has grown on me. Even more, listening to this orchestral version. What do you think?
Avatar Image
Patsy33
1a. Evil group in place to begin an ascent? (4,4)
Avatar Image
Patsy33
Note to all the premature Christmas decorators. Calm down, Mary hasn't even told Joseph she's pregnant yet!  

21 to 40 of 1932

First Previous 1 2 3 4 5 Next Last