Poll : If caught with an itchy bottom in public, do you scratch it or hide to scratch it?

[LochNessMonster]

This always seems to happen when your in a department store ?

I hide, as I shy ?

Nessie TLNM

[joggerjayne]

When you've gotta scratch, you've gotts scratch.

Although it raises the question ... why is one's bottom itching ?????

[funnygirl]

If I'm sitting down, then I will wriggle around on my chair trying to get rid of the itch!!

[andrew1707]

I remember that Billy Connolly advised that if caught with an itchy bum in public you need to shout out as loud as possible "Oh my, I have an incredibly itchy bum and I need to scratch it".
All the people nearby will do the polite thing and look away leaving you to scratch your bum unobserved.

[joggerjayne]

Then there's the tricky issue of getting a thong wedgie when you're somewhere like in the queue at the bank.

[ludwig]

If someone did that to me in the bank queue JJ I'd turn round and give 'em a slap.

[Canary42]

It depends who caught me.

[joggerjayne]

LOL ludwig ... !!

I don't mean someone "giving" you one. That would just be inappropriate behaviour.

I mean when your undies ride a bit too far up you ... err, well, frankly "butt crack". The only way to fix it is to shove your hand down the back of your waistband and "free it up" a bit.

[maggiebee]

My son just says to his 7-year-old, I've got an itchty bum, give it a scratch for me. Funny thing is she usually does.

[NoMercy]

But it always happens on a plane or a train, seagull, hindering your ability to liberate your, err, butt crack...

[rowanwitch]

depends if its a buttock cheek or a bit nearer the centre

[TheOtherHalf]

I sometimes wonder why we get an itch. I will sometimes scratch an itch on my arm etc. but theres nothing there, so why ?

[joggerjayne]

Thing is, hummingbird ... when you need to free up your bum cleavage, you just have to do it!

[Booldawg]

lol rowan! I was going to post that.

Surely a dept store offers enough 'foliage' to have 'have a good dig'

[shoota]

Don't forget the surveillance cameras when 'digging'.....

[rowanwitch]

Take something into a changing room to try it on..... and hope they dont have cctv

[RATTER15]

If it needs to scratched it gets scratched, if you don't want to look turn away but I will scratch it!!

[NoMercy]

Oh no, don't forget the surveillance cameras when "digging". They may think you're shoplifting and could insist upon searching you...

[Khandro]

/I will scratch it!! /
Are you offering?

[sasskins]

Something to do with nerves twitching beneath skin OH. Seem to remember seeing that somewhere.

[cazzz1975]

I have seen a digger sniff their finger afterwards :o