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Berniecuddles2

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Berniecuddles2

Magical!

I was in bed with a woman and she said, "I want tonight to be magical!" And it was. After we had sex, I disappeared....
18:25 Wed 30th Aug 20179 answers, last by Patsy33 20:17 Wed 30th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Arsonist!

I've just found out my girlfriend is an arsonist so I dumped her! I'm gutted we got on like a house on fire!...
08:14 Wed 30th Aug 201714 answers, last by choux 14:36 Wed 30th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Banned!

I got banned from the secret cooking society... For spilling the beans....
06:18 Wed 30th Aug 201710 answers, last by Patsy33 14:28 Wed 30th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Virginity!

Virginity is like a soapbubble, one prick and it's gone....
12:01 Tue 29th Aug 20171 answer, last by Patsy33 14:19 Tue 29th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Ebay

Just answered a post about ebay made me think what's the weirdest thing you've sold or bought? For me when I worked in a pet supply warehouse we got a wrong delivery of tractor parts of all things...
10:57 Tue 29th Aug 20171 answer, last by albaqwerty 11:02 Tue 29th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Judge!

What do you call a judge with no thumbs? Justice fingers....
10:32 Tue 29th Aug 20175 answers, last by Patsy33 14:05 Tue 29th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Origami!

I'm gutted, the local Origami club has folded.
10:25 Tue 29th Aug 201722 answers, last by Patsy33 14:07 Tue 29th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

In A Band !

I used to be in a band called The Hinges. We supported The Doors....
14:10 Mon 28th Aug 201714 answers, last by fiction-factory 20:07 Mon 28th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Wife!

Wife:Why do you talk about my weight behind my back? Husband:By the time I get around to the front, I've forgotten what I was going to say!...
19:18 Sun 27th Aug 20177 answers, last by Patsy33 11:19 Mon 28th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Crossword Soloutions On Ab?

Always amazes me as soon as a crossword clue that needs an answer is answered sometimes in under 30 secs...fantastic ..how do you do it.. do you have all the days newspapers or are you looking online...
12:23 Sun 27th Aug 201712 answers, last by Berniecuddles2 17:05 Sun 27th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Orchestra

Listening to Bermuda Philharmonic Orchestra last night.Half way through the concert the man playing the triangle disappeared
10:07 Sat 26th Aug 201710 answers, last by marval 15:46 Sat 26th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Compulsory Purchase Order For House?

At last got a letter from the Highways agency stating that our house is now blighted so now we can sell it them compulsory purchase order and can start looking properly around the Lincolnshire area...
13:59 Fri 25th Aug 201735 answers, last by albaqwerty 20:38 Fri 25th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Wife's Birthday!

I asked my wife what she wanted for her birthday she said "nothing would make me happier than a diamond necklace " ..so I bought her nothing !...
10:45 Fri 25th Aug 201712 answers, last by shwetamehra860 16:17 Wed 13th Jan 2021
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Berniecuddles2

Private Doctor

I went too see a private doctor about my loss of memory..he made me pay in advance!...
10:40 Fri 25th Aug 201720 answers, last by Berniecuddles2 11:21 Fri 25th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Arrested!

A Man has been arrested after falling into farm machinery whilst trying to steal it. He is due to be bailed on Monday!
07:23 Fri 25th Aug 201712 answers, last by marval 19:10 Fri 25th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

My Dad!

My Dad recently got sacked from working on the Dodgems..... He's going to sue them for Funfair dismissal....
07:10 Fri 25th Aug 201711 answers, last by zebo 09:41 Fri 25th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

My Wife

My wife asked if she could have a little peace and quiet while she cooked dinner... So I took the battery out of the smoke detector!...
18:59 Thu 24th Aug 20171 answer, last by Spicerack 22:13 Mon 28th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Went Out!

I went to a fetish restaurant last night. I got toed in the hole....
13:57 Thu 24th Aug 20175 answers, last by Berniecuddles2 14:05 Thu 24th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Spelling Errors!

I hate spelling errors. You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined....
06:35 Thu 24th Aug 20174 answers, last by 1ozzy 10:46 Thu 24th Aug 2017
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Berniecuddles2

Selfie!

When I was younger a selfie was something we had to do when the wife wasn't in the mood.
18:54 Wed 23rd Aug 20172 answers, last by jim360 21:56 Thu 24th Aug 2017

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