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marval

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marval

Poor Tom

Upon reaching 65, old Tom decided to retire. After having him under foot for a few months, his wife became very agitated with him. She suggested he go and do something to occupy himself, like join a...
10:52 Mon 24th Aug 20092 answers, last by jno 11:14 Tue 25th Aug 2009
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marval

Wood you believe it

Some men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One of the men walked in the office and said, "We need some four-by-twos." The clerk asked, "You mean two-by-fours, don't you?" The man said, "I'll...
13:19 Sun 23rd Aug 20094 answers, last by marval 16:39 Fri 28th Aug 2009
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marval

These notes were left in milk bottles.

Please send me details about cheap milk as I am stagnant. Dear milkman I have just had a baby, please leave another one. Please leave an extra pint of paralysed milk. Milk is needed for the baby....
19:01 Sat 22nd Aug 20098 answers, last by tonyav 11:39 Sun 23rd Aug 2009
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marval

Ooh father

A distinguished young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, "Father, may I ask a favour?" "Of course my child. What may I do for you?" "Well, I bought an expensive woman's...
12:00 Fri 21st Aug 20093 answers, last by tonyav 18:27 Fri 21st Aug 2009
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marval

Little Johnny

Little Johnny was playing in his room when his dad walked in and explained that he and his mom were getting a divorce. "Why Daddy?" asked a confused Little Johnny. "Well, son" he explained, "Your...
20:59 Thu 20th Aug 20091 answer, last by tonyav 18:28 Fri 21st Aug 2009
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marval

Important time in Scotland

In Scotland, the most important time for a young lad is when he "comes of age" and is allowed to purchase and wear his first kilt. A couple of weeks before his important birthday, a young lad went to...
16:08 Wed 19th Aug 2009
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marval

Oops

A married business executive had to make a trip to Palm Beach alone for his corporation. After a few days, he was enjoying himself so much that he decided to stay another week as part of his vacation....
13:48 Tue 18th Aug 20093 answers, last by marval 17:58 Tue 18th Aug 2009
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marval

Not for the dirty minded

It was laying limp in my hand. It was very long, kind of thin. I slid it between my fingers until I got to the end of it. I was turning it on. It became firm in my hands, and the end was wet. Then it...
23:46 Mon 17th Aug 20093 answers, last by rinkins 12:56 Tue 18th Aug 2009
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marval

where are you from?

A virile, young Italian soldier was relaxing at his favourite bar in Rome, when he managed to attract a spectacular young blonde. Things progressed to the point where he invited her back to his...
18:45 Mon 17th Aug 20094 answers, last by marval 12:51 Tue 18th Aug 2009
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marval

A chicken farmer went to a local bar

A chicken farmer went to a local bar... sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne. The woman perks up and says, "How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!" "What a...
11:58 Mon 17th Aug 20095 answers, last by marval 21:24 Mon 17th Aug 2009
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marval

A little girl's prayer

Dear God, in this year please send clothes for all those poor ladies in Daddy's computer Amen!
14:37 Sat 15th Aug 2009
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marval

Where are you from?

Since I was a new patient, I had to fill out an information form for the doctor's files. The nurse reading it over noticed my unusual name. "How do you pronounce it?" she asked. "Na-le-Y-ko," I said,...
14:35 Sat 15th Aug 2009
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marval

Pay up

A couple leaving a Paris hotel were given a bill for 400 Euros. The man protested to the manager who reminded him that he had a room plus bath. "But I didn't take a bath," said the man. "I can't help...
22:55 Fri 14th Aug 2009
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marval

Wrong number

An expectant father rings the hospital to see how his wife is getting on. By mistake he's connected to Lords cricket ground. "How's it going?" he asks. "Fine.", comes the answer, "We've got three out...
14:11 Thu 13th Aug 20093 answers, last by babypeppie 00:18 Sat 15th Aug 2009
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marval

Naughty

Did you hear about the streaker who made a dash through a retirement village? Two old ladies had a stroke, the third couldn't reach.
13:45 Tue 11th Aug 2009
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marval

Messy

It was entertainment night at the Convention Centre and the assembly room was packed because none other than The Amazing Claude, the world's greatest hypnotist, was heading the evening's...
13:37 Mon 10th Aug 20099 answers, last by swanko 23:34 Tue 11th Aug 2009
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marval

When Alice went deer hunting

It was Saturday morning as Jake, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise, he finds his wife,...
23:53 Sun 09th Aug 2009
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marval

Bad dog

Three dogs were sitting in the waiting room at the vet's when they struck up a conversation. The black Lab turned to the chocolate Lab and said, 'So why are you here?' The chocolate Lab replied, 'I'm...
00:06 Sun 09th Aug 20094 answers, last by marval 23:48 Sun 09th Aug 2009
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marval

Oops

A man and his wife were celebrating 50 years together. Their three kids, all very successful, agreed to a Sunday dinner in their honor. "Happy anniversary Mom and Dad," gushed son number one. "Sorry...
13:40 Sat 08th Aug 2009
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marval

It will be Okay

A man was wheeling himself frantically down the hall of the hospital in his wheelchair, just before his operation. The head nurse stopped him and asked, "What's the matter?" He said, "I heard the...
18:16 Fri 07th Aug 20092 answers, last by marval 20:46 Fri 07th Aug 2009

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