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Christmas Present

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Hopkirk | 14:57 Sun 15th Nov 2020 | ChatterBank
35 Answers
What does my wife want for Christmas?
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How about a nice new bag, and maybe even a belt, to go along with the previously mentioned Hoover?
17:16 Sun 15th Nov 2020
OH always used to borrow my hammer drill and set of bosch drills until I mentioned in public one day. He was embarrassed and went and got his own thank goodness. I used to have to hunt for them when I wanted them as he 's not tidy and never puts things away.
How about a nice new bag, and maybe even a belt, to go along with the previously mentioned Hoover?
I'm getting my wife
a pair of shoes
and
a vibrator
Johnny that is one lucky lady.
Is the vibrator attached to some gorgeous hunk?
^^^
Oh I say!

( © Dan Maskell 1965 )
I'm not sure if I'd dare give my daughter one of those pink work tools. She's brilliant at making stuff but ...
My wife was happy with her Black and Decker paint stripper I bought about 30 years ago. The model is now obsolete but our one looks like new. In fact it looks like its never been used. :-)
it were a wallpaper stripper actually wot you put h2o in.
put a red ribbon round yourself and smile x
seeing the vibrator suggestion reminded me of an ann summers party and an old lady said "oh that would be great for making holes when i'm planting bulbs "
You might need a sick bag but how about a beautiful hand mirror with a card that says you want her to see herself as you see her.... Then you say Beautiful and can do what ever you like till well in to the new year.
Last time I saw someone with a red ribbon tied round them was dead.He accidentally hung himself whilst suspended on the door hook of his seedy hotel bedroom on Gloucester Place round the back of Paddington Station. He was starkers with a red ribbon tied around his dangly bit.I think he had a smile on his face but it was damn hard opening the door.
"vibrator"

Ive had a few rubbish ones.Such an anti-climax ;-)
Wot about her two front teeth?
well I get her shoes and a vibrator
because if she don't like the shoes
she can go *** herself

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