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Pulled Over

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marval | 23:23 Thu 13th Jun 2019 | Jokes
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I was pulled over by the police this morning and the officer said, “I’ve pulled you over for weaving in the car.” I replied, “Yes I know, I have almost finished my first rug.”

I recently bought a hen, but every time I touch it I get an electric shock. I think it is from a battery farm.

What do you call 22 mushrooms playing football? The Champignon League.

Picking a lock is very difficult there were two in B&Q that I couldn't decide between.

I was on this line that met a geometrical curve at a common point without actually intersecting its surface. Sorry, I went off on a tangent there.

I have just invented a chocolate and hazelnut sweet that can go from nought to sixty in 4.5 seconds and reach speeds of 180mph. Ferrari Rocher.

Our fuse box blew yesterday so my partner waited in for the guy to come and fix it. It’s all working now he said, when he phoned me. Ian did great job. Ian? I said his name is Jim. Well that is funny, he replied, it said ELECTRIC IAN on his van.

I picked up a traveller on the motorway and asked him the nearest place to get a chocolate bar. He duly obliged. Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy.

I was arrested yesterday on suspicion of murdering my orchestra conductor. Apparently because I had bought a Stradivarius in 2002, an Amati in 1998 and a Guarneri in 1990, the police said I had a history of violins.

I have changed my Mobile provider from O2 to a new service called Gypsy it has Free Roaming.

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LOL, very good Marval. Especially the hen joke.
Good ones, Marval lol..

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Pulled Over

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