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I Was Arrested

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marval | 19:19 Sun 13th May 2018 | Jokes
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I was arrested after smearing somebody’s luggage with Vaseline. The police dropped the case.

I had a few mates round last night to watch the match. I’ve never been so frustrated in all my life! Ninety minutes we sat there and literally nothing happened. Still, I haven’t lost hope. Next week we will step things up a gear and try watching a lighter.

Probably the worst job I have ever had was as a minesweeper. Coal dust gets everywhere.

I had a pen-friend once. But the ink ran out.

I couldn’t believe the flat packed wardrobe I bought from IKEA today. None of the pieces fitted together at all, it was a joke. Honestly, you couldn’t make it up.

I have seen a lot of people dressed up as a couple of gangsters from the East end of London lately. Must be some sort of new Krays.

I am starting up a band with my mates Igneous and Sedimentary. We are more of a rock band.

My mates thought it would be funny to get me hypnotised. Now every time I hear a bell, I lie down and go to sleep. I wouldn’t mind so much but it is playing havoc with my boxing career.

I was planning on making my partner happy today. But I can’t get a dwarf costume from anywhere.

Man has pondered the meaning of Life for thousands of years, but why did no one think to check the dictionary?
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Ha ha. A few crackers there marval. I once listened to the big match but I burnt my ear.
19:49 Mon 14th May 2018
Ha ha. A few crackers there marval.

I once listened to the big match but I burnt my ear.
Lol!
Limestone cowboy would be a good cover for your rock band.

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I Was Arrested

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