Dad Update

[Rockrose]

Spoke to dad last night and I’m shocked at how feeble he sounds.
Also, he appears to have undergone a personality change, there is no longer a filter there and he pretty much says what he wants about anyone.
My gentle father has turned into a teenager, my poor stepmother.

[Smowball]

Am so sorry to hear that RR xx

[waterboatman]

I'm sorry to see that too RR.

[murraymints]

sorry to here what is happening RR... a very difficult time for all...

[Calicogirl]

So sorry RR, this must be ridiculously hard for you to deal with. Sending you much love x

[anneasquith]

Maybe a bit confused rr ?

[hc4361]

A kidney infection is very common in the elderly and can cause the most startling, shocking personality changes. Worth bearing in mind.

[calmck]

Sorry about all this. Personality change goes along with diagnosis as well as kidney infection as mentioned before. Distressing remarks are often said. Try to remember that your dad, as you knew him, is still in there. All you can do really is support your stepmom.

[Rockrose]

Here's a quandary Calico - I have several siblings none of which have talked to my father and I since he married my Stepmother 10ish years ago - he is adamant that they are not told he is ill or dead until after his funeral!
Its a tough one

[Rockrose]

he has been tested for infections so not that - I think the tumour is responsible

[maggiebee]

Must be hard for you RR. Not a lot you can do except be there for him and your stepmother. Neither of my brothers had seen my father in at least 10 years before he died and I've always regretted letting them know when the funeral was. It was a complete farce them being there. If you can bear it, follow your dear dad's wishes. Big hugs coming your way x

[spathiphyllum]

people start to develop a no *** given attitude in dark times.

RockRose i am so sorry to hear this. I can really sympathise.

I can only suggest you follow your dads wishes... Then it makes it an easy one. My thoughts are with you at this hard time

[Patsy33]

A difficult time for you RR. I hope you can find the strength to bear this, so you can be a support to your Dad and Stepmum. x

[mallyh]

my thoughts are with you at this awful time xx

[sherrardk]

Sorry to hear your bad news about your dad, sad times for you all. With regards to your siblings, I wouldn’t tell them - I had to do the same when himself was in ICU.

[Rockrose]

Thanks all, I will of course abide by his wishes - I just feel sorry for SM as she will get the grief when they find out!! Money grabbing scumbags!
Council have come back and said if he hits all the boxes they will fit a shower room in 6 months!!!

[Mamyalynne]

I think you're right about the tumour being the cause of personality change plus of course fear and anger too - I had all that, it's hard to bear.

Follow his wishes as best you can and when the time comes just calmly tell them that.

[Rockrose]

thanks all

[tiggerblue10]

Thinking of you and your dad RR xx

[ummmm]

What meds is he on? xx

[Rockrose]

No idea Ummm, step mother hasn't told me