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sandyRoe | 15:29 Fri 25th Nov 2022 | Body & Soul
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A couple of years ago I was walking Camino trails in Spain.
The longest of them was a path from Sevilla to Santiago. It was just over 1000 km and took me about 40 days.
Now, in my mid 70s, I walk a mile to a local supermarket and am so tired I need to get a taxi home.
There was little else in my life apart from the planning and walking those routes in Spain. Now I sit staring at 4 walls in a state of very deep depression.
I know that I'll not be doing any more long walks. How can I come to accept my present situation?
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Depression is a dreadful state to be in but at least you are acknowledging the problem.
I hope you get the help you need and find something worthwhile and enjoyable to occupy your time.
Try to get your health sorted out first Sandy, make sure there's no underlying problem. Then, hopefully, you can plan a way to lft your spirits. Have you got family or friends that can help?
I think Wolf's idea of writing a book is great. Something to think about. :-)
I'd be seeing my GP - I couldn't walk a mile at the moment, but there's a physical reason, and you might have one too. (I could never have done the walk you did, even in the best of health.) And it's possible that a physical fix might help lift the depression. Being stuck inside four walls is no fun, especially at this time of year. Good luck.
Sandy; 4 or 5 bottles of white wine is about the same alcohol level as a litre of vodka. If you go back to the wine you could perhaps reduce it to three bottles, then two... If you stay on the vodka it's probably difficult to reduce because you'd always be left with a bit at the bottom of the bottle.
Reducing the alcohol is maybe the best way to improve yourself. A bottle less per day will probably leave you feeling a bit better the next morning. If you do notice an improvement, you might feel inspired to cut out another bottle, and so on.
Sandy, when you have dealt with the possible health issues, perhaps you could consider something like a pilgrimage in Ireland. Choose somewhere you would like to go and plan a route using only public transport...buses. Using your bus pass would make this a viable event and costs would be for B&B places to stay along the route. I'm not au fait with the frequency or reliability of buses in N.I/Eire and it might not be a possibility but it's something to work on and plan. Plus, it will limit your drinking time to evenings, when the day's travelling is done.

Did you consume a lot of alcohol when you were walking the Camino trails?
From walking on average 25 kilometres a day for 40 days, to not being able to walk a mile, in around 2 years, is not in my opinion normal ageing and you would be advised to see a GP asap.
Sandy: These good people on AB are well-meaning in suggesting that you go for walks & write books etc. but with the amount you are drinking means you must face the fact that you are an alcoholic, and as such you really need to use the bravery you have shown previously in your life & seek help & guidance:

https://www.nidirect.gov.uk/contacts/alcoholics-anonymous-northern-ireland

https://www.yelp.com/biz/alcoholics-anonymous-belfast-3
Sorry to hear of your problems, I can empathise as I turned 80 earlier this year and then had a TIA (mini-stroke) which affected my vision and led to a permanent ban on driving. I now find a walk to the nearest bus stop a bit exhausting too, so facing "getting on a bit" is quite a challenge. On the plus side, I do find this site gives me a lift at times with all the interesting and kind folk who post here. We have to find alternative occupations to fill the days, and you've had some options given here already.

Good luck with the addiction appointment, this should help reduce your drinking which can't be helping.
Khandro, Sandy has always been forthcoming about being addicted to alcohol. He has taken the first step by seeking medical advice.

Keeping himself occupied and feeling that he is not so isolated and depressed will help.

He is an intelligent guy but, perhaps, he has less faith in himself than we do.

If he does write a book I would be willing to type it up for him, keeping busy might help me cope with my demons.
Trying to ignore the alcohol question for a sec - in June/July a woman posted on one of our local FB groups for our area that she was a single mum & didn’t really have any friends in this area, and would anyone like to meet up for maybe coffee and a chat? Well, she didn’t expect a response but she was inundated with replies. Long story short her post ended up with a group meet at a local pub of about 20 people for a get together. Many many friendships were made that day, and still are - all from one FB POST.
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I always thought that most of the people on AB were decent folk. The replies to this post confirm that thought.
I go next Tuesday to see
An addiction councillor. I'll be very reluctant to go into in-patient treatment but if that's what is recommended I will.
Thank you all for your helpful comments.
Good luck, Sandy
Sandy, prepare yourself for being admitted, though there Is a fair chance you may not .
The only advice I can give you in the interim, is try eat as much nutritious food that you can tolerate. It would be a bonus for your body if/when you start detoxing . Good luck . Anne .
One day at a time, Sandy; good luck!
You know you have lots of support here on AB.
Keep us posted if you feel like it. Most would like to know how you get on and it might inspire others if they too need a boost
If it's any help I know someone - no longer in the prime of youth - who for years rarely left the sofa and drank a bottle of vodka - and sometimes more - a day, until eventually she collapsed and was taken to hospital. Her internal organs were failing. She was in there a week, and I don't know what they said to her or what treatment she received, but whatever it was it worked, because she has never touched a drop since and she's now out and about and enjoying life to the full. An elderly Jewish lady - the treasured mentor of my student days who lost all her family in the Holocaust - once told me, 'When things can't get any darker they must get lighter', and generally that's true. Hope so very often turns out to be worthwhile. You might not be walking the many miles you've walked in the past right now, but you've certainly started the journey to regaining good health. You're talking about it and you're doing something about it, and that is commendable because even with that awful darkness enveloping the mind, it proves you have the strength of character to fight it - and win. Onwards sandyRoe - and my very best wishes to you.
I've just come across your post and read the replies - there's not much more to add, Sandy. I am so pleased you acknowledge you have a problem and are doing something about it - one day in the future, hopefully, you will experience brighter days - alcohol is a depressant.
Thinking of you.
Sandy, I used to read your posts, about your long Spanish walk, out loud to my other half, I was so jealous and really wanted to be there too.
I am so very sorry you’re going through stuff, and have nothing to add except I wish you all the very, very best xx
sandy: May I strongly advise you, not to take any anti-depressants, no matter who prescribes them or tells you to do so.
Don't go down that road.
Antidepressants probably saved my marriage, if not my life, some years ago when I was in a real fug. They can be beneficial.

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