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wildwood

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wildwood

These are classified ads, which were actually placed in a U.K. newspaper

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 years old. Hateful little bastard. Bites! FREE PUPPIES. 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbour's dog. FREE PUPPIES. Mother is a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd....
22:03 Tue 18th Oct 20113 answers, last by Arksided 03:35 Wed 19th Oct 2011
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wildwood

The parrot.

A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week so the magician did the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem: The captain's parrot saw the shows each...
22:01 Tue 18th Oct 20111 answer, last by marval 17:09 Wed 19th Oct 2011
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wildwood

worship.

The prayers by the American Indians were more effective then with the modern religions. Praying for rain eventually produced rain, can't argue with that, even if it took some time! Praying to the sun...
23:34 Sun 16th Oct 20111 answer, last by Buenchico 23:59 Sun 16th Oct 2011
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wildwood

The cost of living.

The cost of living has now gotten so bad that my wife is having sex with me because she can't afford batteries!...
07:53 Tue 11th Oct 20116 answers, last by cupid04 01:06 Wed 12th Oct 2011
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wildwood

THE NUN AND THE HIPPIE

A hippie gets on a bus and spies a pretty young nun. He sits down next to her, and asks her: "Can we have sex?" "No," she replies, "I'm married to God." She stands up,...
00:27 Tue 11th Oct 20111 answer, last by craft1948 00:28 Tue 11th Oct 2011
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wildwood

Voice From The Back Pew

There was a preacher whose wife was expecting a baby so he went before the congregation and asked for a raise. After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher's family expanded,...
08:40 Sat 08th Oct 20114 answers, last by Arksided 19:50 Sat 08th Oct 2011
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wildwood

Why you shouldn't talk to a drunk.

I was getting a few groceries at my local supermarket where I selected: A litre of lite white milk A carton of eggs A litre of orange juice A lettuce A jar of coffee A kg of bacon As I was unloading...
08:23 Sat 08th Oct 20114 answers, last by rockyracoon 08:41 Sat 08th Oct 2011
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wildwood

Women

A Woman is a man's best friend. She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him after a bad day. She will inspire him to do things he never thought he could do; to live without fear and...
05:04 Wed 05th Oct 20114 answers, last by carlton23 14:56 Wed 05th Oct 2011
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wildwood

Why do the main religions require followers to pray?

If their idol is so great, surely it would know the prayers thoughts and take that as devotion....... or is this praying business another tact to make the followers think they are doing something...
21:53 Sat 01st Oct 201159 answers, last by RATTER15 09:50 Tue 11th Oct 2011
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wildwood

Advice to an old guy....

A fella was working out in the gym when he spotted a lovely sweet young thing... He asked the trainer that was near-by, "What machine in here should I use to impress that sweet thing over...
00:01 Wed 28th Sep 20113 answers, last by yelenots 16:41 Thu 29th Sep 2011
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wildwood

Three drunk Irish men

stopped and climbed into a taxi.....the taxi driver figured that they were drunk......so, he just switched on the engine and switched it off after a while and told them : "we have...
08:32 Tue 27th Sep 20119 answers, last by ristian 03:58 Wed 28th Sep 2011
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wildwood

Two older women were having lunch together,

...and discussing the merits of cosmetic surgery. The first woman said, "I need to be honest with you, I'm getting a boob-job." The second woman responded, "Oh, that's nothing. I'm...
08:05 Tue 27th Sep 20114 answers, last by JonnyBoy12 20:26 Tue 27th Sep 2011
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wildwood

Allah

Is the islam allah and the christian god one and the same divinity?
21:13 Sun 25th Sep 201128 answers, last by naomi24 10:04 Wed 05th Oct 2011
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wildwood

Wind power.

Following on from Flob's Q.... There appears to be resistance to wind mills due to noise and sight. So why do they have to be so big?? A standard half size one could be mass produced that would cut...
22:53 Thu 15th Sep 201117 answers, last by jomifl 11:53 Sat 17th Sep 2011
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wildwood

UNIVERSITY STUDY

A study conducted by Sydney University's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle. For...
21:43 Thu 15th Sep 20115 answers, last by Mosaic 19:42 Fri 16th Sep 2011
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wildwood

Brian had been in Police work for 25 years.

Finally sick of the stress, he quits his job and buys 50 acres of land in the hills in Tasmania as far from humanity as possible. He sees the postman once a week and gets groceries once a month....
08:07 Thu 15th Sep 201110 answers, last by beejay1124 21:43 Thu 15th Sep 2011
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wildwood

What is......

What is invisible and smells like carrots? A rabbit's pharte. Sorry....
23:46 Wed 14th Sep 20117 answers, last by zabado 18:53 Fri 16th Sep 2011
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wildwood

Two bulls....

On a cold, cold night two bulls are standing in a field. One says "Boy it's mighty cold out here!", the other says "Yes, I think I might slip into a nice Jersey".
23:40 Wed 14th Sep 20113 answers, last by wildwood 08:02 Thu 15th Sep 2011
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wildwood

Happy feet.

Some of you will remember a couple of months ago when an Emperor penguin in a poor state washed up on a beach in NZ. After a few operations to remove the sand it ate, and $28,000 worth of care to...
22:12 Sat 10th Sep 201115 answers, last by ren-chan 03:49 Sun 18th Sep 2011
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wildwood

Bob and his Missus went horse riding when....

Bob suddenly realised his wife had fallen off her horse, which was quite a relief to him as an hour ago he thought he'd gone deaf. . . . . This joke has been posted exclusively for those who have not...
06:34 Sat 10th Sep 20112 answers, last by JonnyBoy12 11:07 Sat 10th Sep 2011

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