Groaning is permitted

[McMouse]

John Hill, his wife and their 3 children travelled from their home in a small English town to go trecking in the African bush They were expected back after 14 days, but did not return. After 6 months it was assumed they had perished, probably eaten by lions. Enquiries made by friends and family came up blank and and so a memorial event was planned to be held in the town hall and hosted by the Mayor.
On the evening of event the town hall was decked out in bunting, tables were laden with food and drink, a band was playing and the entire population of the town had turned out to pay respect and say farewell.
As the Mayor was about to make his speech he was handed a telegram. He called on the band to play a fanfare as he read out the telegram.........

"The Hill's are alive" to the sound of music.

[squarebear]

Now that's just bad.... :-)

[marval]

Ouch groan factor indeed

[McMouse]

A piece of rope walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender gives him a snide look and says "We don't serve your kind here!" and tosses him out the door. The piece of rope gets up, dusts himself off and walks back in, cheerfully ordering a beer. The bartender again tosses him out with the same remark. This time, the piece of rope gets up, doubles himself into a loop-and-a-half and frizzes out his hair before walking back into the bar and again ordering a beer. The bartender gives him another look of disdain and says "Hey, aren't you the piece of rope I just kicked out of here twice?". "No sir," replies the rope, "I'm afraid not!"

[chrisrob]

I N G - that's grown ing