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Two For The Oldies

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marval | 18:02 Fri 28th Feb 2014 | Jokes
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It was the custom at a retirement home to pair the old couples, and then send them out for dinner and a movie, or other entertainment.

This one night, John who was 84, was paired with Jill who was 86.

A few hours later, Jill returned to the Home and was she angry!

"What happened that you should be so upset, Jill?” the attendant asked her.

"Coming back with that silly old man John, I had to slap him three times while we were riding back in the cab."

"Oh that's terrible...and at his age too. John ought to be ashamed of himself, making passes at you."

"Passes?” Jill said, "he didn't make passes. I had to slap him three times to see if he was asleep or dead."


An old lady, just four feet, nine inches tall, accepted an offer to visit a health club for a free session.

After being greeted heartily, she was shown where she could change and told an instructor would soon be with her.

Having changed her clothes, she went back to the exercise area.

Along one wall she noticed a silver bar that was not in use, and decided to try her hand at chin-ups while she waited.

She jumped up, barely reaching the bar, and managed to strain through two chin-ups before the instructor came to her side.

Smiling politely, the instructor said, "If you want to let go of the coat rack and follow me, I’ll be glad to help you get started."







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