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Is Marriage On The Wain?

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Bobbisox1 | 13:15 Tue 31st Dec 2019 | News
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Mixed sex civil partnerships becomes law today, is the traditional wedding becoming less and less ?
Maybe it’s the cost of being married now, the church or registry office, the dress,cake,bridesmaid etc?
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I see things exactly like bednobs does: The cost is no more than you decide it to be. Due to complicated reasons my wife and I got married at a registrar's with two witnesses plus a guest. Then the five of us went home, we cooked a meal and enjoyed ourselves into the evening. I set up a camera on a tripod for one of the witnesses to snap a picture of the two of us. Looking...
13:37 Tue 31st Dec 2019
Congratulations to Mr and Mrs Khandro for today. We are a couple of years behind you on 52 years this month.
ps ellipsis was right - the civil partnership WAS designed for same sex couples
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Yes bd, I realise that but the law allowing mixed couples did just come into being today....
Also agree with you don’t need any guff but as I’m on my iPad , I can’t copy n paste your comment
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Quite an interesting piece Bazille
I think that society plays a big part in deciding how we think about marriage. In the 50s 'living in sin',living together over the brush' , sex before marriage, unmarried mothers etc. were all frowned upon. Divorce was a complicated,lengthy business.Shotgun weddings ,for unmarried pregnant girls were usually held in a registry office. Even if you were not deeply religious it was the done thing to get married in a church. Marriage was not something to be taken lightly .Often a long courtship followed by an engagement preceded the actual marriage.
Then everything changed . The 60s gave us the contraceptive pill, freedom to sleep around and have casual sex.Couples started to live together. Illegitimate children were no longer frowned on and if you did get married divorce became easier. Instead of husbands and wives society began to talk about partners. Personally ,I think that this makes it seem more like a business deal . Then we had contracts to be signed before marriage. Couples feel the need to re-new their vows. If you made them years ago and stuck faithfully to them there shouldn't be the need to re-new.
Unsure need has much to do with it. Renew vows for the experience if one desires. There was no need to marry in the first place.
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Not sure about the renewing of vows but each to their own I suppose
Just realised that on Wednesday we would have been married for 48 years. I dont know how two totally stubbornly independent people who have always had a firey relationship managed it. No regrets though!!
> Ellipsis, this isn’t about same sex marriages, it’s about mixed couple having a civil ceremony

As was my answer.
Apc; // I dont know how two totally stubbornly independent people who have always had a firey relationship managed it.//

Nor do I, but we did :0)
I think if you find a trouble-free marriage, free from arguments & strife, one of the parties is being subservient & being bullied by the other.
Granted it was eight years ago, but my daughter and son in law married and had ten days in Egypt for £10,000. Everyone said what a lovely wedding it was, you do not need to spend a fortune.
Right from a child I never saw the point in getting married. You are either committed or you aren't. My views haven't changed either. It seems a complicated and insecure waste of time and money to me. I think it will die out sooner or later.
Bazile, the "novelty" wore off within, say, a very few years as probably with most marriages. However, it was replaced by what I might call attachment which has, over the years, simply but steadily grown/matured (do I hear groans from the audience - it's true though).

Renewing the vows is something neither of us finds attractive or worth while - our mutual history has done/established something far more to the point. We are undecided how to mark the anniversary in the summer and so far have spent little effort on mulling it over.

One indication of how unconventional we have been on this front it may be of interest that we actually had our honeymoon before we got married - had to wait for the formality of allowing time from announcement to actual wedding so nipped away on an impromptu holiday. We don't adhere to the social formulae beyond absolute needs, and we agreed it was necessary to get married quickly although neither had intended to. Oh, the guesses are wrong - we had our first child almost nine years later.
I have no idea why opposite ( norm ) cupples want to contract a civil partnership
they already had a register office wedding if they wanted no mumbo jumbo

actually you have a choice of service at the reg office
and you can opt for mumbo jumbo heavy
( why not go to a church?)

weird - and a waste of court time which cd be much better spent telling the Prime Minister he is NOT above the law or something - which Boris seems not to know at all
Why do it at all though, pp?
Khandro - Agreed. One thing it has never been is boring!
Call it progress? Maybe.
But in the fifties, two completely free people made a completely free choice to enter into a legally binding lifelong commitment to stay together, and the result was stronger families, the building blocks of our society.
Yes, it had its downside, but surely better than the casualisation of relationships, and collateral damage done to children.
KARL - Your post raised a smile. I was proposed to on a drunken night on a holiday in Spain and it surprised both of us. So I count that as our 'honeymoon'. We married six weeks later really quietly, with just a few drinks afterwards. No doubt tongues wagged back in those days. Our son was born 11 years later!
it's really just the state reclaiming weddings from the church, which took the ceremonies over from the Middle Ages onward.

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