Is Marriage On The Wain?

[Bobbisox1]

Mixed sex civil partnerships becomes law today, is the traditional wedding becoming less and less ?
Maybe it’s the cost of being married now, the church or registry office, the dress,cake,bridesmaid etc?

[Bazile]

//Is Marriage On The Wain?//

Did you mean, just in England and Wales ?

[Vagus]

I think the generations coming up see marriage as less and less meaningful or necessary.
Certainly in our circle of family and friends maybe two thirds just haven’t bothered to get married but are in stable relationships and have children.
Me, I wouldn’t bother.

[Oleanda]

What exactly is the difference between a civil partnership and a wedding in a registrar's office?

[Apc2604]

Agree with Woofie on this. Weddings these days seems to be all about money and show. Marriage is certainly different to weddings. Getting married can be as cheap as chips, as ours was, and our son's was. So many these days say that can't afford to get married. What they mean is they cant afford a wedding with all the associated paraphernalia.

[shoota]

Religion is on the wane and taking marriage with it.

[Bazile]

KARL
50 years - That's going some - has the novelty worn off
yet ?

Given the circumstances (whatever they were ), when you got married - did you ever consider , over the years , of renewing your vows , and having a bit of a do , to make up for ?

[Apc2604]

I would say though that as generally happens these days living with somebody first is a good idea if the relationship is meaningful and intended to be long term. However, so many these days tend to go from one live-in relationship to the next, ad infinitum, without actually realising that a relationship can go through sticky patches and if you genuinely care for a partner you will go through the rough with the smooth. Today we live in a throwaway society. I have been married for 48 years.

[AuntPollyGrey]

I also would be interested to know the difference between a registry office ceremony and a civil partnership. I seriously don't know why marriage is still popular these days except its a 'do' like a christening is these days. Many couples seem to have a family then get married -what's the point of that!

[Bobbisox1]

Okay, I’m old fashioned re the Christening, I like to see a child christened but marriage? I know of two friends who happily lived with their partners , one couple for 15 years, the other just two, they had children and decided on a big flash wedding with a carriage, a blancmange white billowing gown , several bridesmaids , ushers etc, followed by a honeymoon in an exotic location, the 15 year one, his new wife ‘played away’ the two year one went on the rocks almost immediately

[Cloverjo]

When hetero civil partnerships were first talked about a couple of years ago, my now husband suggested we get ‘civil partnered’. I said no, it’s got to be marriage or we stay as we are. I felt quite offended, actually.
A year or so later we did get married. It cost hardly anything. Just the fees, food and drink for immediate family, my dress (£100), shoes, bouquet and ring.

[jourdain2]

Many, many congratulations Mr &Mrs Khandro! :) x

I think the same as most people, getting married does not cost a fortune. Mr J2 & I met in France, lived together for a few years (he a widower, me divorcee) and eventually decided that this was for life (or what's left of it - he was 79) so we got married - in Yorkshire because it was too complicated to ferry families and small children over to France. We took an out of season (therefore very cheap), dog-friendly holiday cottage, to establish residency, married on Feb. 2nd, had a wonderful family meal (self-catered) and back to France on the 4th. Total cost..... well under £800 and we had a really good holiday thrown in.

I don't think civil partnerships will affect weddings unduly. There is a similar system in France (PACS), but people who take one out and then stick together tend to end up marrying - for legal reasons if no other (Napoleonic Law is fierce).

[Ellipsis]

> What exactly is the difference between a civil partnership and a wedding in a registrar's office?

AFAIK the difference is the patriarchal nature of the wedding ceremony, i.e. it's based around the traditional concept of a woman supporting a man. Civil partnerships, far less traditional and designed for where the marrying parties are both of the same sex, treat both parties the same.

And why a civil partnership rather than nothing at all? I think just the legal convenience of it all when it comes to death, inheritance etc.

[Theland]

Yes mine js definitely on the wain.
Just served 47 years :-)

[Bobbisox1]

Ellipsis, this isn’t about same sex marriages, it’s about mixed couple having a civil ceremony

Wow Jourdain, that’s a lovely story

[Theland]

Congrats Khandro and all other lifers :-)

[Bazile]

//AFAIK the difference is the patriarchal nature of the wedding ceremony, i.e. it's based around the traditional concept of a woman supporting a man.//

You can changed the wording , can't you to what you want , providing that the following is included , as far as i am aware

"I, (Bride/Groom), take you (Groom/Bride), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part."

[emmie]

I can never understand the need to splash out thousands on a frou frou wedding, better stick the money in property, at least you get some return for your dosh.

[Cloverjo]

I’m sure we didn’t say all that at my wedding.

[Bobbisox1]

Vows are made specifically to the request of the couple, heterosexual or same sex, whatever they feel the need to....’vow’

[bednobs]

you dont have to any any of that guff!