Would it set a cat amongst the pigeons to suggest that Simon Cowell organise something along the lines of Britain's Got Giblets?
He's managed to like er, y'know, um, mobilise lazy, feckless, ignorant mouth breathing lard arsed alcoholics to vote for nonentities with his Svengali like powers.
Or Jeremy Kyle? He regularly has brain dead objects spilling their guts anyway. Make use of his talents!
Yes I'm a registered organ donor, you can have the lot. The bile duct is in especially good order. :D