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Tips on how to control your temper?

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Officialusername | 21:17 Mon 03rd Dec 2012 | ChatterBank
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I work in a job where I deal with abusive customers. I used to think I was a patient person, until now. I like my job, I just dislike the abusive people I so frequently come across. I need so self help tips on how to keep my cool when I'm faced with such idiots.
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Just tell yourself that they will soon be gone and out of your hair. After all, you don't have to live with them!
the icy stare over the glasses and silence always works for me
count to ten under your breath.............

B00's reply ought to be a good one as she loves her customers.
They are not being abusive at you, they are being abusive at the job you do, don't take it personally.
Why are they abusive OUN?

to help advise you it would be useful to know what has angered them so.
Just think, "I'm paid to deal with these deadheads." Then put on a professional smile, that'll really rile 'em.
Just take pity on them and take comfort in the fact that they probably wish they were you.

God, I'm such a sarcastic bitch !! Lol
Put yourself in their position. Don't raise your voice. Let them get it all off their chest before you try to help. If they've had a crap time then apologise for it, so many people don't acknowledge when someone has had a rough time. Just be an adult basically, just because someone might be abusive to you, doesn't mean you have to lose your temper in turn, negativity just breeds negativity.
Are you customer facing or is this over the telephone. I deal with this sort of thing over the phone and although its childish - pulling faces and making hand gestures does relax me and makes the abuse easier to take and if it become too foul or abusive I warn that I will hang up and if it continues I do. Even face to face you do not have to take personal or foul abuse and you can refuse to deal with the customer until they calm down
Is there any chance that, since there doesn't seem to be thorough on the job training in dealing with conflict situations, that your employer has little regard for staff or customers and that this may be at the root of many problems?
Regardless of the gripe, abuse towards staff in this day and age is not acceptable. No staff member should put up with it and if they do, then there is something wrong with their management and there are laws to protect staff that should be enforced by the management. If someone`s being an arse, just let it go over your head. They're not complaining about you, they're just sounding off at you because you are the nearest representative of the company. Sometimes, I call their bluff and give them a complaints form. It's quite surprising how often they don't want to take things further. A good repertoire of swear words when you are out of sight works wonders.
Agree with them- leaves them utterly stumped.
"Agree with them- leaves them utterly stumped."

LOL... yep it does, as does accepting the blame (even if it's not your fault).. I've often shut a customer up by saying "I'm sorry, that's totally my fault, I get it sorted for you"..... My manager at the time know it was a tactic of mine to pacify customers so I was never in any danger from accepting responsibility.
There`s no way I`d ever say something was my fault when it wasn't. I probably wouldn't say it was anyone else's fault either. I'd just blame it on some source outside of our environment and that seems to suffice :-)
I've lost count of the number of times a customer's said "christ, stuff's well dear in here" which I reply "I know, Tesco's cheaper, go there" ;-)
When you get one who is pushing you to your limit, imagine him/her as they were when they were a child.
Recently one of my colleagues got a remark from a customer who said "Such and such company are so much better". She said "Sir, we never forget you have a choice". (In other words, f*ck off and use them, then).
Here's another tip: if one of them takes issue with you, particularly if they say something like "I AM THOROUGHLY DISGUSTED..." OR "I AM TOTALLY SICK OF..." turn it back on them by saying "Really! Oh dear, it must be terrible to feel like that!"
The old, smile and picture them naked, works for me. Just don't start laughing.
"There`s no way I`d ever say something was my fault when it wasn't."

Why not? if you're at a supervisory or management level (as I was) then it is your fault, even if it was a member of your staff that made the mistake, take the responsibility for the error and make sure it's fixed.

"I'd just blame it on some source outside of our environment and that seems to suffice"

99.9% of the time that's a fob off, and the customer knows that.

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