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I Almost Won

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marval | 20:27 Sat 17th Nov 2018 | Jokes
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I almost won the final of the “Don’t take off your blindfold” Olympics, but I peaked too soon.

I was going to tell a joke about a silver nugget, a lump of iron and piece of coal walking into a bar, but it is Ore-full.

I got into a fight this morning while listening to some music. I had my iPod on scuffle.

I don’t get along with my colleagues at simultaneous reading club. We’re just not on the same page.

. I lost my mobile so I retraced my steps. It didn’t help, I ran out of paper half way up.

I’m currently measuring the length of the equator in centimetres. I’m going to rule the world.

My car smells like Cherry Menthol. I have just had it Tuned.

I don’t know what the fascination is with strip clubs. It’s just the same old thong and dance.

I have been feeding my chickens sausages and breadcrumbs for the last few days. I can’t wait until they start laying scotch eggs.

I have just read the Civil Service Staff handbook. It’s called “50 Grades of pay.”
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Good ones! Lol..

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