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starone

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starone

Jasmine Perfume

I feel an urge to buy some jasmine scented eau de parfum. Can anyone suggest a brand or two so I can have a look. I usually wear Vera Wang 'Look' which I believe has now gone out of production so I...
23:59 Tue 05th Mar 20136 answers, last by pastafreak 20:37 Mon 11th Mar 2013
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starone

Infidelity

Aussie brandishing a revolver walks into his busy local bar and yells : "Who's been screwing my wife?" Voice from the back of the bar shouts : "You don't have enough ammo, mate!"...
14:26 Tue 05th Mar 20137 answers, last by Tracymichelle 14:50 Sun 28th May 2017
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starone

I Have Broken A Couple Of Ribs

Thought I would do some gardening - ha-ha! Only out there a couple of minutes when a recalcitrant weed made me fall and unfortunately I hit my rib cage on a low wall and have broken a couple of ribs....
14:46 Mon 04th Mar 201323 answers, last by Smowball 16:44 Mon 04th Mar 2013
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starone

Bra Types.

A man walked into the ladies department and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, 'I'd like to buy a bra for my wife. ' 'What type of bra?' asked the clerk. 'Type?' inquires the...
21:23 Sun 03rd Mar 20133 answers, last by Jemisa 00:40 Mon 04th Mar 2013
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starone

Race For Life 2013

Is anyone doing the Race for Life this year? Cannot do it myself, too old etc. but willing to support someone.
10:24 Sun 03rd Mar 201310 answers, last by starone 19:04 Sun 03rd Mar 2013
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starone

Fao Madmen And Anyone Else Interested In Knitting For The Fish And Chip Babies

Here is the pattern for the little jumper for the Fish and Chip Babies. Double Knitting Wool and any oddment will do - stripes are O.K. knitted all in one and best not to use white as it may never get...
10:43 Sat 02nd Mar 201315 answers, last by starone 23:21 Sat 02nd Mar 2013
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starone

The Australian Bin Man.

A refuse collector is driving along a street in Sydney picking up the wheelie bins and emptying them into his compactor. He goes to one house where the bin hasn't been left out, and in the spirit of...
21:24 Fri 01st Mar 20136 answers, last by LochNessMonster 09:28 Sat 02nd Mar 2013
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starone

The Borrowed Shovel.

Last night, I woke for the toilet in the middle of the night and noticed a man sneaking through the next door neighbour's garden. Suddenly my neighbour came from nowhere and smacked him over the head...
21:17 Fri 01st Mar 20132 answers, last by marval 22:10 Fri 01st Mar 2013
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starone

A Few Smiles, If Not Laughs!

I'd just come out of the shop with a meat and potato pie, large chips, mushy peas & a jumbo sausage. A poor homeless man sat there and said 'I've not eaten for two days.' I told him, 'I wish I had...
12:49 Fri 01st Mar 20134 answers, last by marval 20:10 Fri 01st Mar 2013
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starone

The Value Of A Catholic Education Aka The No. 2 Pencil.

Little Susie was not the best student in Catholic School . Usually she slept through the class. One day her teacher, a Nun, called on her while she was sleeping. 'Tell me Susie, who created the...
11:23 Fri 01st Mar 20134 answers, last by vodkancoke 20:11 Fri 01st Mar 2013
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starone

I Think It Is My 5 Year Anniversary

I joined AB on 29th February 2008. That is five years ago. Or should I say five years tomorrow, although it is 1st March? Very confusing. Must be awful to be born on a Leap year's extra day. If the...
19:00 Thu 28th Feb 201315 answers, last by Ann 00:46 Fri 01st Mar 2013
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starone

Who Said Men Were Not Romantic!

What's love got to do with it ? My friend's wife being the romantic sort, just sent him a text. It read:- If you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are...
18:48 Thu 28th Feb 20137 answers, last by frugalfred 19:42 Thu 28th Feb 2013
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starone

The Deaf Wife Problem

Bert feared his wife Peg wasn't hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem. The...
00:17 Thu 28th Feb 20133 answers, last by marval 00:49 Thu 28th Feb 2013
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starone

A Flying Accident

Shortly after a British Airways flight had reached its cruising altitude, the captain announced: 'Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain. Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from London Heathrow to...
21:39 Wed 27th Feb 20138 answers, last by marval 00:47 Thu 28th Feb 2013
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starone

As Time Passes

Over five thousand years ago Moses said to the children of Israel, "Pick up your shovel, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the promised land." Nearly 50 years ago, Harold Wilson...
16:32 Wed 27th Feb 20132 answers, last by VHG 19:17 Wed 27th Feb 2013
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starone

Full Body Scans

Disclosed: The official Airport Screening Result for Full Body Scans at Heathrow Airport. October 2012 Statistics On Airport Screening From The Home Office Terrorists Discovered 0 Transvestites 133...
16:21 Wed 27th Feb 20135 answers, last by tenrec 19:46 Wed 27th Feb 2013
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starone

A Little Known Fact

The first testicular guard (“box”) was used in cricket in 1874 And the first helmet was used in 1974. Just imagine, it took 100 years for men to realise that their brains could be as important as...
21:49 Mon 25th Feb 20138 answers, last by askyourgran 22:59 Mon 25th Feb 2013
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starone

Economic Stimulus Payments

Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another Economic Stimulus payment. This is, indeed a very exciting programme, and I'll explain it by using a Q & A format: Q. What is an Economic...
17:57 Mon 25th Feb 20133 answers, last by starone 21:21 Mon 25th Feb 2013
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The Business Deal

A Chinese guy goes into a Jewish-owned establishment to buy black bras, size 38. The Jewish store keeper, known for his skills as a businessman, says that black bras are rare and that he is finding it...
17:33 Mon 25th Feb 20132 answers, last by marval 18:05 Mon 25th Feb 2013
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starone

The Future's Looking Grim

A group of chaps, all age 40, discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the waitresses there were gorgeous, with tight...
17:23 Mon 25th Feb 20135 answers, last by rsvp 22:36 Wed 27th Feb 2013

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