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retrocop

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One Liners (Probably Ex Cracker)

Subject: One line funnies Tried to catch some Fog. I mist. When chemists die, they barium. Jokes about German sausage are the wurst. A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a...
16:56 Mon 14th Dec 20158 answers, last by gollob 08:41 Sun 14th Feb 2016
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Not Heard From Jourdain2

I have been out the UK for a while recently and have noticed Jourdain has not posted since 8th December. Any one have news of her. Is she OK? Also bouncer is absent . Where has he gone?...
01:29 Mon 14th Dec 20154 answers, last by scorpiojo 01:52 Mon 14th Dec 2015
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Canada,islam And Human Rights

https://www.youtube.com/embed/XELWyJeKSV0?rel=0&showinfo=0 Even if these Muslims are moderate troublemakers it is small wonder their odious religion and followers attract so much animosity worldwide....
13:47 Sat 12th Dec 201524 answers, last by david small 20:30 Fri 04th Mar 2016
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On Sex

"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz SL500."Lynn Lavner "Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool...
00:32 Sat 12th Dec 20156 answers, last by marval 16:11 Sat 12th Dec 2015
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Pig Racing

Well, fry my bacon! HURRAY for Texas ! Yes OK it is Fox News A Muslim association buys eleven acres of land next to a pig farm (a family farm that has been in Houston a long time) and NOW WANTS THE...
02:40 Thu 10th Dec 201530 answers, last by andy-hughes 16:24 Thu 10th Dec 2015
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The Marseillais

I thought what a wonderful gesture was made yesterday at all the UK football matches. Thousands of football supporters standing in respect to the recorded French anthem . Some mouthed the words,some...
15:14 Sun 22nd Nov 201544 answers, last by Jackdaw33 22:57 Sun 22nd Nov 2015
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Fao Ric.ror (Bowel Cancer)

I spoke to wife re frequency of colonosopy checks with a family history of bowel cancer. She said that her hospital would keep you on their records and notify you every 5years to attend. As you...
09:58 Fri 20th Nov 201511 answers, last by Sqad 12:14 Fri 20th Nov 2015
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Daesh Losing More Friends And Influence

That pretty much the Worlds Super Powers against them now. Nothing like going out in a bang. https://uk.news.yahoo.com/beijing-vows-harsh-response-isis-052001823.html#uI5mZ6K...
10:30 Thu 19th Nov 201532 answers, last by naomi24 17:59 Thu 19th Nov 2015
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Arming British Police

Forgive me for putting this in News when I do not supply some link to invite you to debate this thread. Earlier today on LBC radio it was asked if we think, in light of Paris, that British police...
01:37 Mon 16th Nov 2015109 answers, last by retrocop 00:56 Wed 18th Nov 2015
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Pet Schnauzer

My neighbour found out that her pet Schnauzer could hardly hear, so she took it to the veterinarian. The vet discovered that the problem was hair in the dog's ears: he cleaned both ears, and then the...
12:45 Sun 01st Nov 2015
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A Thought!!!! What Have We Come To!!!?????????

In the light of recent police announcements that they no longer consider it necessary to attend the scene of domestic burglaries I have taken down the St. George's flag from beside the house and...
12:26 Sun 01st Nov 20151 answer, last by janbee 07:05 Mon 02nd Nov 2015
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Tea Room Tryst

Two old spinsters met in a village tea shop just out of town where they lived. Gracie said to Phillis,"Did you come in the bus?" Phillis replied,"Yes dear but I pretended it was an asthma attack!"...
20:50 Sat 31st Oct 20151 answer, last by marval 16:22 Sun 01st Nov 2015
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Come Here Often?

Back in the 1930s Daphne and her boyfriend Rupert were on their annual cycling tour holiday. They were cycling through a quaint old English village. Rupert called to Daphne who was alongside," I say...
18:31 Sat 31st Oct 2015
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The D.m. Giant Crossword

Just completed this crossword. If it helps others I would like to point out that the clue for 34d (ramps) appears incorrect. It should read "romps" The Daily Mail Compositor at his devlish best...
11:38 Sat 31st Oct 20156 answers, last by dannyk13 11:52 Sat 31st Oct 2015
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Age Has Its Advantages

Toward the end of the Sunday service, the Minister asked, "How many of you have forgiven your enemies?" 80% held up their hands. The Minister then repeated his question. All responded this time,...
13:10 Thu 29th Oct 20154 answers, last by Shaglene 15:29 Thu 29th Oct 2015
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Balders . Birthday Greetings

Belated Birthday Greetings for Yesterday. I obviousl noted a few South Atlantic Gongs on the Mails Front page. Recognise any faces? Best Wishes and Splice the Mainbrace. :-)...
09:34 Thu 29th Oct 201522 answers, last by Baldric 23:33 Thu 29th Oct 2015
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From A Great Height

So this is what it means to be **** on from a great height!! https://uk.news.yahoo.com/frozen-poo-leaves-huge-hole-093149515.html#asinyRh...
15:57 Wed 28th Oct 20151 answer, last by anotheoldgit 16:38 Wed 28th Oct 2015
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Labour Party

Tom Watson is Deputy leader of the Labour Party and Jeremy Corbyn is its leader. That is official then. The Labour Party is run by Tom and Jerry!!...
18:05 Tue 27th Oct 201517 answers, last by Hypognosis 08:21 Thu 29th Oct 2015
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Whiff Of Hypocrisy Here

https://uk.news.yahoo.com/germaine-greer-faces-uni-backlash-over-sex-swap-063811307.html#2WHWGco I would of thought so called intelligent university graduates would welcome the chance to debate with...
11:11 Sat 24th Oct 201512 answers, last by mikey4444 12:38 Sat 24th Oct 2015
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Horrific Bus Crash

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-34613637 The Death toll for this RTA is horrific.I would be interested to know what the accident investigators findings are. How tragic. You could be forgiven...
10:29 Fri 23rd Oct 201523 answers, last by EDDIE51 16:10 Fri 23rd Oct 2015

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