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dilligaf

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dilligaf

Health check

Went to see the nurse today for my annual health check. She said..............I think you stop w4nking...........I asked why?....... She said because I'm trying to examine you.
19:30 Mon 18th Jun 20072 answers, last by Marvelman 21:58 Mon 18th Jun 2007
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dilligaf

What would you do.

If the woman you are with says she is uncomfortable watching you w4nk, what should you do? (a) suggest you spend more time together. (b) call her a prude. (c) suggert she sits somewhere on the bus.
13:07 Mon 18th Jun 20071 answer, last by dilligaf 13:16 Mon 18th Jun 2007
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dilligaf

Elderly couple in church.

Half way through the service she leans over and whispered in her husbands ear. I just let out a silent f4rt, what should I do? He replies Put a new battery in your hearing aid.
19:35 Sun 17th Jun 20072 answers, last by LucianaScott 12:52 Wed 27th Jun 2007
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dilligaf

Moben kitchen

Have just agreed to Moben fitting our new kitchen, pricey but they said they could supply what we want and fit it when we want. Speaking to a friend tonight, he said that while driving through Barnet...
21:51 Wed 13th Jun 20077 answers, last by dilligaf 19:31 Fri 15th Jun 2007
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dilligaf

It happened in Belfast.

A little boy was knocked over when crossing the Falls Road. An elderly lady came over to help and said shall I get you a Priest ? He replied No thanks, right now sex is the last thing on my mind.
18:55 Fri 08th Jun 20071 answer, last by sleepy1 22:55 Sat 09th Jun 2007
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dilligaf

Family

For the first time (out of boredom) I went onto the above site. WOW. I thought I had problems. Anyone else have the same opinion or is it me?
22:21 Sat 02nd Jun 20073 answers, last by Mattk 11:46 Sun 03rd Jun 2007
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dilligaf

Swans

Why do swans often tuck one of their legs up behind their wing when they are in water?
22:07 Sat 02nd Jun 20073 answers, last by dilligaf 19:52 Sun 03rd Jun 2007
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dilligaf

Steels partner

Who was Steels partner in the 1979 TV series? And out of curiosity, which series.
22:48 Sun 27th May 20074 answers, last by dilligaf 23:02 Sun 27th May 2007
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dilligaf

Parrots

A lady approaches a priest and says to him, 'Father I have a problem. >I have two female parrots but they only know how to say one thing'. > > What do they say?' the priest inquired' >...
10:28 Fri 25th May 20072 answers, last by wizard69 13:51 Fri 25th May 2007
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dilligaf

Outlook 2003 calender.

Somehow I have gone off the original format ie. one day per page, and although I can access (with difficulty) individual entries from the last two years, I am unable to view a day / month / year at a...
09:14 Fri 18th May 2007
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dilligaf

Growing a pineapple

I once saw a plant which was grown from the top of a pineapple. Is the top planted in standard type compost, how is it fed, etc etc? Does anyone know how it is done? I am about to attempt it so any...
15:28 Sat 12th May 20072 answers, last by dilligaf 16:38 Sun 13th May 2007
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dilligaf

No tax, no MoT, no Insurance.

My MoT expires on 25th May. Just in case there was something wrong I took it in today and it passed. My tax is due at the end of June so I expect DVLA will write before hand telling me so. If not I...
19:10 Thu 10th May 20077 answers, last by dilligaf 20:18 Fri 11th May 2007
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dilligaf

spell check

Is there now a spell check on this site? I just had two incorrectly words underlined. One was tyre and it suggested tire so I assume it is American origin.
18:12 Mon 07th May 200714 answers, last by Ethel 10:59 Tue 08th May 2007
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dilligaf

For the men only

Put the titled question in body and soul. Don't know if it was the right place. Have a look and as usual, any comments will be appreciated.
18:55 Wed 18th Apr 2007
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dilligaf

For the men only.

Frequently, especially after a few pints, I flush the loo half way through a pee, hoping to finish before the flush does but it never works. The flush finishes before I do. Consequently I have to...
18:49 Wed 18th Apr 200716 answers, last by bodeker 20:13 Tue 02nd Aug 2016
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dilligaf

Fly spray

Apart from the obvious (thank you) how exactly does a fly spray kill flies. I don't like flies and have no inhabitions about spraying them but they do seem to suffer a horrendous death.
18:52 Mon 16th Apr 200712 answers, last by arburgirl 13:52 Thu 19th Apr 2007
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dilligaf

Graves

I have just returned from a funeral where the deceased was burried in a double plot next to her husband who died 20 years ago. The second grave was far shallower than that of her husband, I also...
18:55 Thu 12th Apr 20075 answers, last by RATTER15 23:21 Fri 13th Apr 2007
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dilligaf

Pimp

Our local dyslexic pimp has just bought a new warehouse.
09:55 Fri 06th Apr 2007
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dilligaf

Results

Doctor to patient: We have received the results of your test, do you want the bad news or the worse news. Patient: Give me the bad news first. Doctor: The results show you only have 48 hours to live....
09:48 Fri 06th Apr 2007
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dilligaf

Pigeons.

When pigeons mate, how long does the act of mating last?
18:42 Thu 05th Apr 20077 answers, last by smiffy65 18:29 Fri 06th Apr 2007

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