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Stereotypes ...

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sunny-dave | 20:44 Mon 29th Jul 2013 | ChatterBank
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... are oh so often true :)

I spent most of Saturday and Sunday afternoons in a hi-viz jacket - directing traffic & sorting out parking, for friends who were opening their garden for the NGS. Not a trivial job, over 500 visitors across the two days, and a busyish road outside the house to keep moving.

In the whole time that I was invested with the (entirely spurious) authority that a hi-viz gives, virtually everyone was friendly, happy and co-operative ...

... but (you just saw that 'but' coming, didn't you) there were exactly two exceptions.

1. The Old Git who parallel parked on the pavement, neatly in the middle of a space that would take two cars :

"Please don't park on the pavement - it means that people will have to walk into the road to get past you"

"Sorry, I'm not risking my wing mirrors by parking on the road" (in a line of 30 or so cars, all neatly parked on the road)

"Please move forward so that someone can use the space behind you"

"I always take a big space so that non-one will bump me"


*** He was driving ..... a Volvo Estate :) ***


2. The person who waited until I was 50 yards away sorting something else & then moved a couple of cones so that they could park right outside the House entrance.

"Please don't park there it was coned off for a reason - the space is specifically kept clear to enable safe access to a couple of disabled parking spaces by the house. There is plenty of parking across the road in the field"

"I'm not taking my car into a field - and I don't see why I should walk that far anyway when there is room here" (there wasn't)

*** The car was a .... BMW soft top. The driver a (physically fit, albeit 'with work done') woman of about 40ish - bottle blonde hair, sunglasses - the whole bit ***


Karma was organised (I'm good like that) - the Volvo was effectively blocked in by two later arrivals - he could easily have got out of the space if he was on the road, but from the path it was a 98 iterations back/forward shuffle - with me watching that he didn't touch his precious bumpers on anything.

The BMW was totally blocked by the wheelchair adapted van I allowed to park in front of her ... it's amazing how long I took to find the keyholder :)


They are probably both wondering who folded their mirrors in too - actually they probably aren't because I can't see that either of them would ever use them.


Happy Days.


PS : We raised over £2,000 in the two days - and had a lot of fun too :)
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I admire your savior faire dave, I would have been a wreck if I'd had to put up with that selfish lot.
Go on humbersloop, my imagination is running riot.
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The couple of hundred others were lovely AyG - a really nice couple of afternoons.
Well done Dave
Fantastic total, Dave but next time borrow my catapult...or better still MrsO's flame thrower....that'd get them parking where you want....x
..make her think, daisy - dorothy parker
now I know why NCP sacked her.
Tony, if they had parked smartly and orderly the flames would have missed their tyres....;-) x

Drive OHs Beemer from time to time, it did cost extra to fit indicators
And you can take peeps by surprise if you actually use them
I had to have two new tyres on Friday gness, anything to do with you !.
^so it was you who turned right in front of me on Saturday balders?!
Getting better with the catapult eh, Tony!...x
Yes gness, but please stop using tin tacks.
I might have been inclined (in my dreams only of course) to stick a couple of screws next to her fron tyres. Stroppy cow. (Dave, do you want me to come to the next do, I am famous for my traffic directing abilities although my father would probably rather forget my "JUST Fluffing MOVE IT" fiasco.....)
Not a blow out then, Tony!

Psybbo
Not a blow out then, Tony!

I'm not that lucky, Psybbo !.
Come.

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