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What Do I Do?

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anthony25 | 11:22 Thu 28th Mar 2013 | ChatterBank
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Hello all,not sure if ive posted this in the right place but anyway,i have been with my girlfriend 9 years now,we live together have 2 littlle girls,4 and 7..we have been through a hell of alot,including 5 miscarriages and so on,but the past 5 years i have been such an idiot,i got involved with drugs which led to me going out on weekends and basically not coming home for 2 days sometimes,mostly through me being ashamed etc,my partner obviously has all sorts going through her head and often we would split up for a week,month,and so on,more recently we split for 16 weeks through xmas and new year and she asked back home in min january this year,although in the time apart i found her out up town with another guy and her uncle just a week after we broke up,they saw me and ran off,then facebook messages from him saying on his status "i realise how much i like u now babe"..then she was coming in at 6am some weekends saying she had fell asleep on a friends sofa,it was out of character,she started ignoring me completely wen this guy was on the scene,i found out who he was asked him wa was going on he said they are just friends,she said she hardly knows him,im struggling since being back home knowing the truth,i think they were sleeping togeher ...but when i ask her to talk about it she gets angry and says nothing happend its all in my head and i cant seem to get any answers so its all inside me and i have horrible thoughts...........i love her but...wa do i do....
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".wa do i do.... "

Leave?

By the sounds of it, you've actually been apart more than together anyway.
I wouldn't have thought when you were apart was really anything to do with you as you were split. Plus you can't really have any highground with regards to what time she comes home when in the past you didn't come home for a couple of days.

Maybe try relationship counselling and see if that will help you both.
You sound like ideal candidates for Jeremy Kyle.
You seem to be one who can give it, but not take it. Did she support you when you were having weekends/days away? Was she suspicious when you didn't come home for days on end? Have you been putting it about? Perhaps your girlfriend is doing nothing wrong or perhaps she's looking for revenge.
You need to sit down together and calmly talk about you relationship. Where it is now. Where you both want it to be. What you can both do to re-establish the trust in the relationship. If you're still doing the cannabis this can lead to paranoia, which is where you seem to be.
Have you any idea what all this is doing to your two children? they will be mentally scarred for life. When they grow up who do you think they will blame? YOU! Stop being an idiot & grow up.Before you get involved with... Whatever, think first of the consequences..THINK.

jem

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