I have a 13 year old son who, until he started secondary school last year, was a lovely, polite,funny child. Over the last 12 months he has turned into a surly, moody pain in the a*se! I know this is partly due to hormones and his need to 'fit in' with his peers but I am finding it more and more difficult to reason with him and even when he is grounded or has things removed as a punishment, he just shrugs and doesn't seem to care. He isn't violent or verbally abusive (finding it hard to get more than grunt out of him!) but isn't doing as well at school as he could be. He has a developed a 'couldn't care less' attitude to most things. I know he isn't smoking, drinking or taking drugs but would appreciate some advice on how to get him motivated into doing something. Will he grow out of this?
He sounds like most of the students in my classes- in fact if he isn't violent or verbally abusive then he's one of the better ones, so I don't think you are doing anything wrong and I think he'll grow out of it (by the time he's 23).
As he has changed so dramatically over his 1st year in new school and is more couldn't care less than argumentative are you sure he isn't being bullied. As his school work is going down a visit to the school may be necessary.
I have asked at school if there is anything going on but they have told me he is fairly popular with his classmates. I asked him if there was anything on his mind he wanted to talk about but he said no. There haven't been any dramatic changes at home in the last year either.
All of mine got a bit of an attitude during their first year at Secondary school I spoke to the teachers about it and it seemed to be quite common. I think it is being around older children, bigger schools and so on. They all settled down again though.