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Why is blatant sexism still tolerated?
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I watched last nights edition of Celebrity Big Brother and was very uncomfortable when Housemate Coolio (aman) started ranting about women, calling them 'ho's' and bitches and saying how they should stay at home, cleaning and looking after children...blah, blah, blah. The men all found this highly amusing, including socialist politician Tommy, who you would have thought would not share these views.
It got me thinking. If these comments had been made to a gay house member, the others would have been jumping down his throat in disgust and if even a hint of racism had been dealt, he would have been thrown off the show. (OK...I know he's black but you know what I mean) So why is blatant, offensive sexism still tolerated so readily? I was actually quite offended and felt down that this was accepted 'as if nothing.'
It got me thinking. If these comments had been made to a gay house member, the others would have been jumping down his throat in disgust and if even a hint of racism had been dealt, he would have been thrown off the show. (OK...I know he's black but you know what I mean) So why is blatant, offensive sexism still tolerated so readily? I was actually quite offended and felt down that this was accepted 'as if nothing.'
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It's just something that I've found along the years Beso and for years I have asked the question to virtually every bloke I've met and the answer is always the same. Maybe the fact that every male friend I've ever had has always secretley desired me says more about me, than men! I don't know.
Beso is Spanish for Kiss, is it not...or is that just a co-incidence?
Good reply by the way.
Beso is Spanish for Kiss, is it not...or is that just a co-incidence?
Good reply by the way.
Only when men are given the freedom to express themselves without being seen as inferior will we be able to fully take our place as the emotional peers of women.
Centuries of emotional supression and warfare have leached the male psyche. Such is the stigma of being a sensitive man it is especially diffucult fo them to get through adolesence unscahted. Many young men are b@stardised into the "yobbo" culture for fear of rejection.
Some of us identified with and preferred the company of women where physical strength was not usually a factor in the pecking order.
I had a terrible time at school. A boy who cried was about as low as the pecking order went. While girls who cried were immediately supported by their peers boys who expressed themselfes in this way were ostracised and accused of being gay. Sadly this treatment was inflicted by both boys and girls.
Young women need to realise if they want to change the world they need to seek out and support the men and boys who are too timid to assert their dominance.
Centuries of emotional supression and warfare have leached the male psyche. Such is the stigma of being a sensitive man it is especially diffucult fo them to get through adolesence unscahted. Many young men are b@stardised into the "yobbo" culture for fear of rejection.
Some of us identified with and preferred the company of women where physical strength was not usually a factor in the pecking order.
I had a terrible time at school. A boy who cried was about as low as the pecking order went. While girls who cried were immediately supported by their peers boys who expressed themselfes in this way were ostracised and accused of being gay. Sadly this treatment was inflicted by both boys and girls.
Young women need to realise if they want to change the world they need to seek out and support the men and boys who are too timid to assert their dominance.
Right lets be carefull here:
Coolio is the product of his upbringing. Gangster rap is an extention of ghetto life in America, or so we are led to believe. I have long needed an explanation as to why gangster rap is allowed to be broadcast with its deaming lyrics towards women and its anti homophobic leanings.
Coolio is a ganster wrapper and it may be that he doesn't see it as offensive, but it shows the dual standards in this country in that this music can be broadcast with impunity.
This also applies to use of the N word which is also liberally used in gangster wrap. This is a word that if imployed by anyone other than a Black person is seen as racist, however if it is used and broadcast in gangster wrap why cant it be used by anyone.
Its like the C word, taboo for everyone, but if women started singing about it in a descriptive sense would it become ok as long as it was only sung by a women?
Double standards lead to this kind of trouble and yet again is an example of PC gone mad.
Coolio is the product of his upbringing. Gangster rap is an extention of ghetto life in America, or so we are led to believe. I have long needed an explanation as to why gangster rap is allowed to be broadcast with its deaming lyrics towards women and its anti homophobic leanings.
Coolio is a ganster wrapper and it may be that he doesn't see it as offensive, but it shows the dual standards in this country in that this music can be broadcast with impunity.
This also applies to use of the N word which is also liberally used in gangster wrap. This is a word that if imployed by anyone other than a Black person is seen as racist, however if it is used and broadcast in gangster wrap why cant it be used by anyone.
Its like the C word, taboo for everyone, but if women started singing about it in a descriptive sense would it become ok as long as it was only sung by a women?
Double standards lead to this kind of trouble and yet again is an example of PC gone mad.
Thank you for your answers and especially you beso, for taking the time and trouble to answer so thoughtfully.
I had not considered how life must be for the more sensitive bloke...please bear in mind though that although what you say is correct and that men can be the subject of sexism...it is always there for women, at many turns in life, even when not said..the undercurrent across our lives is often not even noticed as it is 'normal.'
I'm sure I would have liked you very much at school!
I had not considered how life must be for the more sensitive bloke...please bear in mind though that although what you say is correct and that men can be the subject of sexism...it is always there for women, at many turns in life, even when not said..the undercurrent across our lives is often not even noticed as it is 'normal.'
I'm sure I would have liked you very much at school!
Women organised themselves and the men who understood the true menaing of equality into an incredibly effective social change movement. Women had a long history of supporting each other through the repercussions.
While women were being denied careers, men have been treated as, to use a term coined by a friend, "work objects". Sexism was always two directional.
The difference was in the redefinition of prejudice taken on by feminists in the 1960s and 70s. Feminists measured advantage by a tragic scale. All that traditionally belonged to men was ascribed immense worth and those role traditionally adopted by woem were denigrated.
Little wonder women were so easily portrayed as incredibly disadvantaged. Men were sexually opressed equally as women but in different ways.
Tragically the value of the care of children was reduced to "demeaning" because it was associated with women. We paid a big price for the gains made by women's liberation because it was driven by anger.
Men traditionally dealt with big questions alone. To show vulnerability was to afford advantage to a competitior. Our awakening is yet to dawn on a significant scale. We do not have the network of emotional support enjoyed by most women so the progress is slow compared to the changes wrought by the women's movement.
I struggled with self esteem as an adolescent because I was not the physical equal of my peers. Indeed I didn't feel that my peers were necessarily boys, I was always more comfortable in the company of girls. Yet i felt myself unworthy of their attention. Especialy the attention of the one I adored.
The kind of boys who grow into great husbands are those who have been nurtured and accepted as a human being rather than a member of a particular gender. Give them some attention and they blossom.
It is a great pity that girls seem so often driven to have the bad boys.
While women were being denied careers, men have been treated as, to use a term coined by a friend, "work objects". Sexism was always two directional.
The difference was in the redefinition of prejudice taken on by feminists in the 1960s and 70s. Feminists measured advantage by a tragic scale. All that traditionally belonged to men was ascribed immense worth and those role traditionally adopted by woem were denigrated.
Little wonder women were so easily portrayed as incredibly disadvantaged. Men were sexually opressed equally as women but in different ways.
Tragically the value of the care of children was reduced to "demeaning" because it was associated with women. We paid a big price for the gains made by women's liberation because it was driven by anger.
Men traditionally dealt with big questions alone. To show vulnerability was to afford advantage to a competitior. Our awakening is yet to dawn on a significant scale. We do not have the network of emotional support enjoyed by most women so the progress is slow compared to the changes wrought by the women's movement.
I struggled with self esteem as an adolescent because I was not the physical equal of my peers. Indeed I didn't feel that my peers were necessarily boys, I was always more comfortable in the company of girls. Yet i felt myself unworthy of their attention. Especialy the attention of the one I adored.
The kind of boys who grow into great husbands are those who have been nurtured and accepted as a human being rather than a member of a particular gender. Give them some attention and they blossom.
It is a great pity that girls seem so often driven to have the bad boys.
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