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should i find out the sex???

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moominmonsta | 14:17 Tue 23rd Jan 2007 | Pregnancy
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Im going 4 my 20 week scan on monday but i dnt no weather i shud find out the sex. What did most of you do??
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I'm planing on finding out the sex of my child.

In depends whether you want that surprise at ur birth i suppose...?

Me and my boyfriend are waaaay too impatient to wait.
My partner and i decided not to find out. We wanted to find out when we met our child. The reasoning behind my decision was that i was worried that if i knew the sex of the baby then id give him or her a fixed name, plan what they would look like, sound like, grow up to be and plan a whole life for them and us. Should anything have then happened to that child then i felt that the loss would be even more unbearable. I had no reason to believe anything would happen but it was like tempting fate and i didnt want to do that.
I put it on my birth plan that we didnt want the midwife telling us as baby was born either but that we wanted to look as the baby was handed to us. That baby turned out to be a bouncing baby boy and i cant describe how we felt at that time.
Also it was lovely to phone everyone and announce the arrival of a grandson or nephew.
I found out with my first, it was good in a way because I could plan things better, Im now pregnant again and im not sure if I want to find out but I probably will just because im impatient, part of me wishes you couldnt find out so I had a surprise but I dont think I will be able to resist!
no dont, there are very few surprises left in life, and finding out the sex of your baby at birth can be quite magical.
I found out when I was pregnant with Mini Boo as we wanted to plan ahead, and it minimised the name argument down a bit!

Saying that though, I got a wobble on when preparing my 'going in' bag and packed white, green and lemon baby gros incase the midwife was wrong when I had my scan.

Needless to say Mini Boo arrived- and i was able to put her in pink :-)

Congratulations by the way and good luck!
i never wanted to know what any of mine were - after all that effort you need something to look forward to and a lovely surprise they were too. all girls :0)
I found out with my first pregnancy that I was a having a baby boy who is now 2 1/2. I planned his name decorated his bedroom bought all boys clothes etc and then Just waited to meet him.

With my second pregnancy I didnt find out what I was having. We couldnt wait to find out what it was when baby was born and when I found out that it was a girl it was the best surprise and feeling ever she is now 5 1/2 months.

Its best to wait and see what the sex is when babys born. Its best to get a big surprise after being pregnant and waiting for 9 months.


We didn't find out the sex of our first baby and it was such a wonerful surprise to find out after all that pushing!!!
With our second child we felt it would be better to know for the practicalities of clothing, room decoration.etc. and it was exciting when we had the scan.
We found out, but without being rude, why would you base such an important decision on what a bunch of people you don't actually know said on the net?

The only answer is 'do what is right for you' (and this is an important principle that crops up time and time again throughout pregnancy - there are many ways of doing so many pregnancy-related things and as long as you're making an informed decision, whatever *you* choose is the right choice). There is no 'right' or 'wrong' answer and it certainly shouldn't matter what other people do or say.
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I wanted to ask the people on here because alot of them have had more than 1 baby and have lots of experience and i wanted to know there opinion aswell as people that know me.
This is m first baby and i want to do it right and id ask every1 on the planet if i could!!!!!!! lol thanks for your answers xx xx
My point is that their experiences are only good for them, as mine are for me. Like I say, we found out, and that was the right thing for us, but it doesn't follow that it would be for you. Similarly, if everyone on here said, 'Oh no, we didn't find out,' that has absolutely no bearing on whether you should.

These things are personal decisions, and as I mentioned, you'll find a great many things throughout the pregnancy where you have options; pain relief, what position you give birth in, home birth/ hospital birth. The only correct thing for you to do is what is right for you, and no one else can possibly answer that for you.

I feel quite strongly about this as my wife was 'bullied' about her choice of a home birth by several doctors and had she been a less forthright person, she might have allowed herself to go through a birth that wasn't right for her. We knew all the options and the risks for all of them, and we made the right decision for us, but I'd never presume to say it's the right decision for anyone else.
i'm writing this and i've realised that you've probably already gone for your scan, hope it went well, love to know what you're having if you did find out?! ahyhow, my partner and i decided not to find out both times, i strongly agree with one of the guys earlier that their are precious few NICE surprises in this world and its delicious and magical to find out what you've got the day you have him/her. However, having said that, having had two boys, and still deciding whether to go in for number 3, i think i would find out next time as it would be nice to have a daughter to finish our brood, but all children are gifts and should be cherished. if this is your first child, it really shouldn't matter what sex the baby is and i would do it all the same if i had my time once again.x
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Im having a litle baby boy!!!! im so unbelivably xcited n my boyfriend is over the moon n he cried wen i was having the scan!! how cute! xx xx xx xx xx

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