ChatterBank0 min ago
Words and Meanings
Asthma: What you do if dad says no
Beauty Parlour: A place where women curl up and dye.
Cannibal: Someone who is fed up with people
Diplomat: A man who can convince his wife she would look fat in a fur coat.
Egosurfing: Scanning the net, databases, print media, or research papers looking for the mention of your name.
Floppy: The condition of a constant computer user's stomach due to lack of exercise and a steady diet of junk food.
Gentleman: A husband who steadies the stepladder so that his wife will not fall while she paints the ceiling.
Husband: A person who is the boss of his house and has his wife's permission to say so.
Inflation: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper
Joint Checking Account: A handy little device which permits the wife to beat the husband to the draw.
Keyboard Plaque: The disgusting build-up of dirt and crud found on
computer keyboards. "Are there any other terminals I can use? This one has a bad case of keyboard plaque."
Lactomangulation: Manhandling the "open here" spout on a milk container
so badly that one has to resort to the 'illegal' side.
Mistress: Something between a mister and a mattress.
Nanogram: Telegram delivered by your grandmother
Organ Transplant: Time to call the piano movers
Pasteurize: Too far to see
Recovery room: Place to do upholstery
Spouse: Someone who will stand by you through all the trouble you wouldn’t have had if you'd stayed single in the first place.
Telecrastination: The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you're only six inches away.
Urine: Opposite of "You're Out".
Vulva: Swedish automobile.
World Wide Wait: The real meaning of WWW.
Yawn: An honest opinion openly expressed
Beauty Parlour: A place where women curl up and dye.
Cannibal: Someone who is fed up with people
Diplomat: A man who can convince his wife she would look fat in a fur coat.
Egosurfing: Scanning the net, databases, print media, or research papers looking for the mention of your name.
Floppy: The condition of a constant computer user's stomach due to lack of exercise and a steady diet of junk food.
Gentleman: A husband who steadies the stepladder so that his wife will not fall while she paints the ceiling.
Husband: A person who is the boss of his house and has his wife's permission to say so.
Inflation: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper
Joint Checking Account: A handy little device which permits the wife to beat the husband to the draw.
Keyboard Plaque: The disgusting build-up of dirt and crud found on
computer keyboards. "Are there any other terminals I can use? This one has a bad case of keyboard plaque."
Lactomangulation: Manhandling the "open here" spout on a milk container
so badly that one has to resort to the 'illegal' side.
Mistress: Something between a mister and a mattress.
Nanogram: Telegram delivered by your grandmother
Organ Transplant: Time to call the piano movers
Pasteurize: Too far to see
Recovery room: Place to do upholstery
Spouse: Someone who will stand by you through all the trouble you wouldn’t have had if you'd stayed single in the first place.
Telecrastination: The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you're only six inches away.
Urine: Opposite of "You're Out".
Vulva: Swedish automobile.
World Wide Wait: The real meaning of WWW.
Yawn: An honest opinion openly expressed
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