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Should How To Make More Friends?

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Molotov | 06:13 Mon 09th Mar 2020 | Society & Culture
11 Answers
So I have 3 good friends at my school and a few acquaintances. My dad is disappointed/worried/ashamed that I'm not extroverted like him. He says I should have at least 30 good friends. How do I talk to more people?
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You are not your dad. You are you. You have three good friends, that's fine, others will come along in time.
So???
Your father may be confusing quantity and quality. I certainly only have a handful of real friends (plus family). 30 seems an extremely and unnecessarily high number to me.
I have called a number of people friends over the years and I have learned that one or two, or in my case four amazing people is plenty. Lots of acquaintances, a few social contacts. But four real trust with my life and deepest secrets friends.
I have three GOOD friends, that I know I can trust 100% with my life and they'd be there for me in an emergency ..... I also have LOTS of other friends with varying degrees of "closeness".
Forget what your dad says - you're you and you're not your dad ..... do what you're comfortable with :)
I have found that the more extroverted a person is, the less amount of time I wish to spend in their company. True, they are usually good for a laugh for a half hour or so but their often relentless zest can become a tad tiresome after a while. Nothing wrong with being a little introverted just as long as one is not melting into the background like a wallflower at a dance. Good friends come along by chance and the fewer one has, the more 'good' they are likely to be.
You can count true friends on one hand, anyone after that are acquaintances
Tell your dad its none of his business
Sounds like your dad has a problem rather than yourself. Not being extrovert is a good thing, they can be a pain at times.

A small number of close true friends is far better than tens or hundreds of acquaintances who you simply know.

That said, being about to talk to folk is a good social skill. To expand yourself, it's sometimes good to deliberately tackle a thing you are uncomfortable with. Not so much as it stresses you out, but gradually until an uncomfortable situation becomes a familiar one that does faze you any more.

So, maybe join a club for something that interests you. Practice saying, "Hello" to folk there that you don't know, and maybe have a few irrelevant but generally interesting things you can talk about if needed. Most chat is unimportant anyway, it's the social interaction, getting to know someone, that's of value; and more importantly, being at ease with it because you've been there so many times it's no longer a worry.
You do not need that many good friends, three or four is a good number. The rest are aquaintances, friends yes, best friends no.
Your father is wrong....very wrong and what is worse he is making you worry about yourself and your friendships...IMO that is not what parents should be doing and , as I said , he is wrong. You have 3 good friends at school. I have no doubt they are supportive and listen when you are upset and are thrilled for you when things go your way. As you move on with your life you will make a few more close friends at each stage...work, college etc. You are doing fine. You are not your dad and should never try to be like he suggests you should be.

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