O A P Couple May Be Without Lettuce Over Christmas

[Muntin]

This should have probably been posted under 'News' but I haven't got a link yet as details of this shocking affair are still coming in.
Please feel free to contribute if you hear any more.

[Tilly2]

Oh let us, oh let us eat lettuce!

[fiction-factory]

maybe this?
https://www.travelandleisure.com/travel-news/queen-elizabeth-slug-salad-note

[BANANASPLITS]

This is just the tip of the iceberg!

[Muntin]

No-one should have to go without lettuce over the Christmas season, but this may happen to white haired Mr, Simon Coudby-Anyone and his wife Esme, 87.
"We went shopping two weeks ago and completely forgot to buy any lettuce, and no-one noticed. I am definitely looking for someone to blame" said Mr Coudby-Anyone to our social affairs reporter.

[Muntin]

We went right through the Second World War without Bananas and now this. How could they have let us leave the shop knowing we had forgotten the lettuce without saying anything? Is this what our so-called 'caring society' has come to? We rang up so called Social Services but they weren't interested.

[Hopkirk]

Perhaps they are romainers, blaming Brexit.

[maggiebee]

That's a little gem Hoppy

[fiction-factory]

Give 'em a rocket, Muntim

[Prudie]

Is it cos they are Waitrose shoppers?

[fiction-factory]

It's be cos, be cos, be cos

[fiction-factory]

Sorry, crossed posts Prudie- I wasn't taking a leaf out of your book

[ChillDoubt]

Lettuce pray.....

[fiction-factory]

I hope they Romaine calm over this

[Prudie]

Feel free FF, I wouldn't have the heart to say no

[Toorak]

It’s when you read threads like this you realise the webb’s Wonderful

[AuntLydia]

Its radicchio it really it -what a pair of butter heads!

[Muntin]

News coming in from our Lettuce and Curly Salad Desk.
Possible rescue for lettuce-gate couple?
Army Reservists, Police and the Fire and Rescue Service and RNLI with the expert help of the National Trust and Kew Gardens are about to mount a daring attempt to bring Xmas lettuce relief to Mr and Mrs Coudby-Anyone, believed to live in a house somewhere.
'If true, this could completely revive our faith in human nature, or maybe not', said Mr Coudby-Anyone, guardedly.

[tamborine]

a drunk in muslim clothes has fallen down in my hedge. Ive phoned for an ambulance & he is breathing okay.

[Old_Geezer]

What's the point of having lettuce anyway ? If served it one only has to faf about removing it from the food and putting it in the bin :-(

[tamborine]

ambulance taken man. Pity him when his wife is told