Am I just too old fashioned ?.

[zabado]

While in town the other day I was walking through the shopping centre and as I went through a swing door I stopped and held the door open for a young woman behind me . To my amazement she stopped dead in her tracks and spat out the words " Don't patronize me " .
Question .. What did I do wrong ?.

[pericat]

Absolutely nothing - I would always hold a door open or expect one to be held open for me - and I expect a thank you - my kids have been brought up the same way - maybe you should have provided salt and vinegar to this girl to go with her tremendous chip!

[chakka35]

Alas, you do sometimes get this sort of graceless behaviour. The last time it happened to me I said "Sorry ma'am, it's called good manners. It should work both ways, but obviously not this time." and left her to it.

[sara3]

what an awful woman!

[Androcles]

I would have done exactly the same and held the door. In response to the rudness, I think I would have said something along the lines of "I 'm sorry but you looked in need of patronising".

[Seadragon]

If she stopped dead in her tracks, I would have let the door swing in her face.
Just ignore it, clearly she has a problem with good manners.

[tonyav]

You did nothing wrong, she's an ignorant tw@t.

[naomi24]

You didn't do anything wrong. If good manners are now deemed old fashioned, then it's a sad indictment on our society.

[cazzz1975]

I always hold the door open for anyone, if she reacted in that awful way then I would have just let it go and slam in her face, miserable cow!

[zabado]

Thanks for your comments .I do believe in chivalry towards women and I would give up my seat for a lady . But it seems to me that the youth of today treat chivalry as a weakness. Then there's the lack of respect .Did you see the photo in the papers this week of a student ( Philip Laing ) in Sheffield urinating on a war memorial and soaking the wreaths of poppies. What an insult to the hero's who fought and died for his freedom. If you can read this Mr Laing it's written in English and then wonder why it's not written in German.

[Sachs]

zab,
I hope this will not stop you being a 'gent' in the future? I think it was very nice of you!

[zabado]

It won't Sachs.
But it just makes me think twice.

[vulcan]

It does make you wonder if good manners are worth bothering with, last week as I entered a cafe I noticed a young woman behind me struggling with a pushchair. I held the door open and lifted the front of the pushchair over the step. She pushed pass me without a word and then to add insult to injury, took my place in the queue !.

[sophie_1003]

It really annoys me when people don't say thank you, at university the other day our class was going in to a room while some of the class who were in there before were still in there. They all waited really patiently and one of the girls was holding the door open and looked a bit miserable, I was one of the last ones in and said "Thank you" as I went in and the girl holding the door gave me a bit of a surprised look and said "Oh, that's OK!" it just made me realise that of the 20 or so people to go before me hardly any of them could have said thank you for her to have this reaction. What soes it cost just to say two words to recognise that someone has helped you out?

[tamborine]

that'll teach you.......leave the young women alone!

[Quizmonster]

Years ago, I read of an elderly gentleman who offered his bus-seat to a young woman. Clearly, she was a raging feminist and she also roundly abused him for 'patronising' her. His reply was, "I offered you my seat, madam, not because YOU are a lady but because I am a gentleman." Try that, if such a door-holding episode ever occurs again, Zabado.

[zabado]

Oh ! Quizmonster what a cracking reply I've got to try that one the next time I meet someone so ignorant . Thanks

[saxy_jag]

This may buck the AB trend somewhat, but I tend to get better manners from teenagers and young mums than from any other group. Whether that's because I actually treat them with a little respect, I'm not sure. Most of the pushing past in queues, door swinging and expectation of deference comes from the older generation, I'm sad to say.

[Verix]

I think that\'s awful! What a ridiculous thing to say to someone who is clearly trying to be nice.

Though i do wish people wouldn\'t assume that \'all teenagers are ignorant thugs\'. If anything i think it shows ignorance to generalise so broadly and without reason. I\'m nineteen and hold the door open for everyone and i cringe when people accept things without saying thank you.

I wouldn\'t worry too much though Zabado i think politness will still get you more postiive responses than negative.

[ludwig]

She's not only rude but incredibly stupid. Holding the door for someone isn't a gender related issue. It's a common courtesy that anyone should do for anyone else.

[flobadob]

I hope that you insisted that she go through the door before you moved on. Then tripped her as she passed.