Legend, you wanted to know why I did'nt answer you.

logic | 11:46 Fri 04th Apr 2008 | ChatterBank

18 Answers

Whilst having breakfast this morning, I noticed a suspicious looking chap getting into a neighbours car, and drive off, I immediately sprang into action, ran up to the shed and got my mountain bike out and gave pursuit, after pedalling furiously for about two miles I began to get a bit out of breath, so I called the Police from the transmitter in my wrist watch, about one minute elapsed before I heard the sirens in the background,
But alas they couldn't keep up so I knew that reprimanding this thief was up to me, so I called on my last resources of strength and pedalled furiously, within two minutes I was gaining on him, I was about two metres behind him, but his exhaust fumes started to choke me, I tried to cover my mouth and nose with my shirt flap, and was just starting to recover, when this Eddie Stobbart lorry shot out of a side junction and knocked me off my bike, I was furious, so I jumped up and dragged the driver out of his cab, and gave chase in the articulated lorry, It wasn't as quick as my mountain bike but at least I was back in the chase,
By this time the traffic was getting in my way so I mounted the pavement and carried on, I was thinking about legend, and wished I had his Harley Davidson, but I had to make do with what I had, suddenly a disabled chap threw his zimmer frame at me and smashed the windscreen, then I realised my luck was in as the car went into a cul-de sac (that's a dead end by the way ) and then I knew I had got him, so I rammed him with the front of my juggernaught, and that stopped the chase immediately, by this time the police caught up and dragged the driver out,
It turned out that this chap had just bought the car off E/BAY ,I must admit to feeling a bit silly at this point.
But I will never attempt a citizens arrest again.