How Do You Broach The Subject

[queenofmean]

I have a pen pal from Canada. We have been writing now for 2 years. Recently though she has been saying that she is really happy that I was made redundant last spring. How do I go about explaining that this isn't/wasn't a good thing. Considering all the hassle I had to go through to get my redundancy pay and things. I know that if she's a true friend she will understand (but I've tried before and it still I'm so pleased/happy you were..) I mean yes ok I now have free time to do other things whilst caring for mum but I lost my job/good earnings etc. How do I explain this without being harsh (I can sometimes be too much to the point)

TIA
Queenie

[B00]

"it sucks"

There...done!

[queenofmean]

Might just try that BOO ;) if all else fails

[Psybbo]

BA to B00, blunt and to the point!

[Prudie]

Ask stuey if being made redundant means something different in Canada. Does she means she's happy because you have more time to write to her?

[queenofmean]

I could actually expand on it as well Sib

[B00]

On a side issue, do you mean pen pal as in letter writing and air mailing them? Corrr, I genuinely didn't know people still did that.

I used to have a French pen pal when I was at school, she was well weird, it didn't last!

[queenofmean]

That's what I've been asking myself Prudie...does it mean something different. I often wonder if shes happy because I can write more letters and do more stitching.

If you see Stuey send him here to have a look please

[queenofmean]

Yes BOO, we write letters and send them by Air Mail. I have 2 in Canada, 1 in Oz and 4 or 5 more from down south.

I've had a few weird ones too. The Girl from Oz is really nice but she thinks my parents are separated and constantly asks if I have a dad if I didn't have one I wouldn't be here

[EDDIE51]

It is amazing what words are different to a Canadian . I once tried to explain to a Canadian that we had not been able to complete her job because we had a power cut. It was not until I told her we had a' power outage' that she understood what I meant. Try explaining that you have been 'laid off' that may do it.

[queenofmean]

Thank You Eddie...I'll maybe try that

[Jackdaw33]

Very true about different meanings in other countries. Perhaps in Canada redundant equals retired/resigned?

[xstitcher]

Just say it the same way you have here. I didn't think it was harsh at all.

[Jackdaw33]

The classic, of course, is to say to an American, "I'm just nipping out for a quick fag, back in ten minutes."

[sherrardk]

I always got the impression that you didn't like your job (not just in the way that lots of people don't like going to work) - maybe that's how your penpal is 'reading' the situation. Maybe you could say that you didn't realise how much you'd miss it.

[xstitcher]

Speaking as an x Canadian I can tell you that redundant means the same in Canada.

[queenofmean]

There were times Sherr where I could have seen it far enough (sometimes it was the people you were on with or stuff that just didn't go right etc.) but at the end of the day it paid my bills and things. I do miss it particularly this time of the year all the new stock would be coming in and I'd probably be dressing the window this week. You never really do miss what you have until its gone.

Its possible Jack.

I'll see what decides to flow out my pen when I get to that part of the letter.

[queenofmean]

Thank you X-stitcher.

Do you still stitch? (i'm assuming by your name you stitch)

[mikey4444]

Not quite sure why she should say that she is happy that you lost your job ?

It doesn't make sense to me.

[stuey]

I know what the word means simply because I've been around this site for a while; however, if I hadn't, and someone from the UK informed me that they had been made redundant, I would ask them to explain what they meant. Over here you get fired (sacked); you get laid off; or you retire.

[queenofmean]

Nor me Mikey...at first I let it go but she keeps bringing it up. So time has come for me to really nip in the bud, properly and not just being like yeah ok etc