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Oldies Will U Derstand This

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bhg481 | 11:23 Wed 31st Jan 2018 | Jokes
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1. My goal for 2017 was to lose 10 pounds. Only 15 to go.

2. Ate salad for dinner. Mostly croutons & tomatoes. Really just one big round crouton covered with tomato sauce. And cheese. FINE, it was a pizza. I ate a pizza.

3. How to prepare Tofu:

a. Throw it in the trash

b. Grill some meat.

4. I just did a week's worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.

5. I don't mean to brag, but I finished my 14-day diet food in 3 hours and 20 minutes.

6. A recent study has found women who carry a little extra weight live longer than men who mention it.

7. Kids today don't know how easy they have it. When I was young, I had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV channel.

8. Senility has been a smooth transition for me.

9. Remember back when we were kids and every time it was below zero outside they closed school? Nah, me neither.

10. I may not be that funny or athletic or good looking or smart or talented. I forgot where I was going with this.

11. I love being over 65. I learn something new every day and forget 5 others.

12. A thief broke into my house last night. He started searching for money so I woke up and searched with him.

13. I think I'll just put an "Out of Order" sticker on my forehead and call it a day.

14. Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed.
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very good, i understood every word..
You sound senile to me.
no, just having a good day...
That was to the OP em, but I'm not very good in jokes, I can never think of anything witty to say !
i thought it very funny and can totally identify with it.
Lol! Love them. Thanks
hereIam //That was to the OP em, but I'm not very good in jokes, I can never think of anything witty to say ! //

You should apply to the aBBC, H.
:-))
What's the aBBC, H ????

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