How can I make some friends?

[karmgirl]

I've looked at evening classes and even applied for some but didn't even hear back from college.

I've thought about part time Sat job in supermarket or fashion store,

I need to meet people who are my age (21)

Any other ideas welcome

[MrBen5]

Hmmm, not too sure where you live, but at 21 and you dont work?
You do meet most people through work.
Have you not got any friends at all?

[~max~]

why don't you call the college back? They are very busy at this time of year, and you might have to chase up your application.
I enrolled in a course too, and although it is only once a week, it gets me out of the house, and everyone in it is lovely, so I can see a few othem becoming mates! :O)
A part time job is also a good idea, as is enrolling in a "craft" class, like pottery, photography...Surprisingly good fun!
Any reason why you don't work full time, btw?

[logic]

I find it difficult to believe that someone as young as you is short of friends,
Sorry I can't advise on the question.

[~max~]

There are loads of reason why someone might not have many friends, and being anti-social is not the main one, Logic. Being away from home, having just broken up with someone and losing a chunk of your social network, being shy, having low self-esteem through various reasons.....It's not that easy being young! lol

[bensmum]

Have you tried phoning the college to see if they have had your application? I work in Adult & Community Education and this is a manic time of year - if people send an enrolment in we don't always acknowledge it unless there is a problem.
If you have time on your hands you could also try some voluntary work - there are opportunities in many areas and this can sometimes lead to paid work

[karmgirl]

I do work full time but its a small office with only 3 people including myself and the other two are in their early 30's. There's not much scope of meeting any new people there.

Thing is with the craft classes is that the ones I have seen I can't imagine young people going to and not sure which shop would be best to choose to meet young people, debenhams perhaps but they are all really pretty in there and really into fashion and I don't think I've got the right sort of look that the recruiter might be looking for in there, maybe argos but not sure

Well I'm just a rare sad case logic I'm afraid

[MrBen5]

hey your not a sad case karmgirl :)
Have you tried internet chat rooms and forums. Or even facebook. You might be able to trace some of your old friends through there. Then you can suggest to meet up with them.
Even if you go out with older people, you still have a chance of making friends with people your age.

[mirela]

hi karmgirl, get a 4 or 8 hours part time in fashion store is good idea to meet new people. i used to work in monsoon and made lots friends there, there are lots girls similar age like you. you can get staff discount as well:)

[karmgirl]

I am going to try phoning the college but most of the courses have started now and not sure if I could get on one. Worth a try though.

I used to have a bar job but I was rubbish at that and not confident enough at all, there were young people there and they invited me out into town a couple of times but I felt too shy and unconfident to go out with them. It will be different if I work somewhere else I think, bar staff tend to seem to be really confident.

I think I've thought of every avenue I could try, even applied for voluntary work but thats a right load of hassle, they wanted two references and a form filled out and I could never get hold of the person I needed to speak to there.

[ChuckFickens]

errrr, don't dismiss you co workers just because they are in their early 30's age doesn't really come into friendships. Why not ask if they want to go our for a few drinks one evening, you may even meet other people while you are out, or...

Have you not got a local pub, just wander in one night for a couple of drinks and see who you meet and start chatting too, it's not seen as being such a taboo for a woman to walk into a pub on her own these days.

[MrBen5]

Hmmm, A woman walking into a pub on her own???
Next she will be ordering a pint...

[~max~]

Errr....(same as Chuck!) , I'm in my early 30's too! Well, 31, but I'm not a boring old fart yet, I hope!
I'm actually the only in the class who has gone to the pub after class so far, but I'm still working on trying to sway a few....lol
30 doesn't always mean married, kids, stay at home and go to bed at 11pm, you know! But you have to make an effort too, and if you ask around who wants to go for a drink on a friday afternoon maybe, you might get to know some of them better?

[karmgirl]

Oh don't get me wrong chuckfickens, I haven't dismissed my work colleagues, we are all friends there, but I still need people my own age to hang round with too

It's not as easy as it sounds for a girl of 21 to walk into a bar on her own and start talking to a random stranger

Thanks everyone for your ideas, I've already explored them all - it just shows it's not easy at all to make new friends. I thought, I'll just send an app to the college, no probs and I'll be on a course in sept, but no response, thought I'd apply for voluntary but they wanted a load of forms filled in (bearing in mind this is only for voluntary work) I didn't want the fuss for unpaid work and I couldn't think of two references, craft classes are a good idea but are there really lots of young people that do these courses?

I'll keep trying, thanks very much xxx :-)

[~max~]

"It's not as easy as it sounds for a girl of 21 to walk into a bar on her own and start talking to a random stranger "

Well...I used to do it, and I still do.....And I'm no trollope....Well! lol

When I mentioned "crafts", I didn't mean cross stitching of knitting! lol But if you're interested in maybe photography, web design, writing....I'm sure there are loads of young people in those areas!

[MrBen5]

hey, what bars do you go in max?
i wouldnt mind a woman coming talking to me in a bar.

[~max~]

lol! I don't come up to strangers, but I usually wiggle my way into a group, and by the end of the night, it's just like we're all best mates! lol Well, for the night anyway! :O)
There are rules. I should write a book, really! lol

[karmgirl]

yes maybe your right max

I will give that a try I guess, that's a task and a half too, trying to find a class thats

a) something your interested in
b) something thats in your area
c) something thats in your price range
d) something thats at a time that suits

Thanks for your help x

[pinktwink]

i think working in a store or bar/restaurant part time may help have you thought of volunteer work with groups nspca etc or try taking up a sport hill walking

[wonkon-wonk]

Karmgirl you know full well what you need to enroll for at college don't you?

[MrBen5]

Of course if you want to take the easy route(as it seems you cant be bothered putting any effort into anything), you can always have imaginary friends...