How Life Can Change Over Time

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Baldric | 10:32 Thu 30th Aug 2018 | Body & Soul
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Regulars will know that over the last 12 months or so Mrs B. has had Health problems.
We met in late 1984 married in 1987, never looked back.
In July last year Mrs B, Kate, had a 'Blackout' was taken into A&E due to Tachycardia and a certain amount of confusion, was there for 3 days, but no diagnosis.
This happened twice more in next 2 months, during the second of those episodes she 'fitted' while waiting for the Ambulance and again in the Ambulance Bay at the Hospital.
Another 3-4 days inpatient care, this time a tentative "It could be Late Onset Epilepsy"
About 3 weeks later one evening she stood up to go to bed, then bent down to pick her blanket up off the floor, before I could stop her she bent forwards, overbalanced, banged her head on coffee table and off to A&E again for 4 days this time. There was no blanket to be picked up only in her mind.
When we visited she wanted to know why we were covered in orange spots and could we please stop those two horrible men shouting, it was an all Female Ward, no men except well behaved visitors.
During those 4 days we received some very strange 'phone calls from her saying she was at a Hotel in Norwich, or she was on a Flight to Belgium, and also some quite rational ones talking about Family, Dogs etc.
She has been Episode free since last October, which is good, however her balance is very shakey, she cannot walk very well, suffers short term memory loss, gets the shakes a lot and is dilusional at times.
Is having lots of Tests, Examinations etc.
Obviously has surrendered her Driving Licience.
I have spent the last 13 months basically looking after a Woman I no longer know, she has changed so much, does not alter what I feel for her but it is bloody hard work, we just get on with it, and do what has to be done.
I have not written this because I feel sorry for myself because I don't, I'm not that sort of person.
I guess if there's anything I want to say it is 'Just cherish what you have 'cause you never know what's around the next corner


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Been out so only just picked up on this. Really sorry to hear what you have been going through, I know when you love someone you sign on for whatever comes but we all hope it won't happen. I am glad you have good support, and I hope you will have a proper diagnosis soon. It is so different when the enemy has a name and you know then if anything can be done. I knew that Dave...
19:32 Thu 30th Aug 2018
Hard times Baldric, hard times. We never know what is around the corner, I have had some financial not so good news this morning and was getting stressed out, now you have put it all in perspective for me. Good luck.
Very wise words Balders.
^'Just cherish what you have 'cause you never know what's around the next corner^
It's difficult. x

Question Author

Anne, believe it or not we've still not had a definitive diagnosis, lots of tests ongoing, Neurologists etc.

Sam. Thanks, and to you.

Danny, Thanks.
This puts a lot of the things we discuss on here into perspective, doesn't it.

I, like many others, have experienced similar- demntia- with older relatives- in my case aunts, grandparents and a MIl- but I can't imagine what it must be like when the loved one is your spouse/long term partner (or indeed a son/daughter for some people) and they are no longer quite the person they were.

We did a real health scare a few years ago requiring a brain op and that really focused the mind but there was always a strong chance of a successful recovery and things seem fine now.
I hope things improve- and they may for periods- and that you continue to have the support of your family.
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ummmm, it surely is.

I should have added, one of the Pills she is on has a known side-effect, it causes 'Irritability' unfortunately I can confirm that is very true.
You have my sympathy anyway.
I am aware, earlier generations of my family changed. Awaiting my turn next ?
When my dad was ill....he wanted to go to the pub so OK we'll go pub, he then tried to brush his teeth was a razor. It's things like that the drugs effect. It just sad and very worrying.
Very hard times when things take a shift like this and even though we know the harsh and unkind words come from a troubled mind they still sting and hurt you, coming from someone you care so much about.

Sending strength to add to what you already have.x
Aye mate, those corners suck.

Good thoughts.
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Thanks OG, who knows what's coming our way next?
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Mamya and Doug, Thank you.
I wish Mrs B some improvement.
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FF and Anne, thank you both.
Your OP's last sentence is so true, Baldric.

It can be hard beyond measure to suck up the harsh words & keep going regardless. I'm glad you have the support of family & friends & can only hope for some improvement for Mrs B, but she's in good hands, I think.

Best wishes to you all.
i dont take my health for granted anymore, i was never ill in all my years, fit as a butchers !!!

now this year ive had gout , eye problems, kidney & liver & heart problems etc and i dont think the old head works as it once did either
i did cherish what i had till it was Mr Em's time, losing a loved one was difficult, and i fully understand your predicament, as he finally succumbed to cancer of the brain, so your story rather resonates, i wish you both all the love in the world and hope you can get the help you both need.
Baldric--you say that one of her pills could cause' irritability'. Maybe the doctor could prescribe an alternative?I would get all her medication checked out if I was you.

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