its a sad xmas

[slinky.kate]

i cant bring myself to get christmassy,the tree is not up,refused invitations for xmas dinner,i just miss rex so much,i did'nt think it would be this bad but i feel as if he is still in the house but i cant see him,son and i was sorting photos and found a lot of rex and we both started blubbing(he's 23) i suppose time is supposed to be a great healer.

[ttfn]

Bless you kate - I do know how you feel ♥

[jaydah]

Could you take in another dog ? There are so many wanting good homes, you're a perfect recipient as you have the experience.

[barb1314]

Oh bless you slinky.kate. It's so sad when you lose a beloved member of your family. We lost our border collie 6 years ago on New Years Eve whilst we were away. The most horrible,sad experience of my life. I can smile about her now and just over 2 years ago I was ready to fall in love with another dog. Now Lottie,my adorable black labrador,has stolen my heart. Time will heal. I know it's a cliche but so true. Try your very best to enjoy Christmas. Take care.

[treetops1]

My daughters the same, we had to have ours put down november due to nasal cancer. He slept with her and sat in the bathroom with her as she is epileptic. We have the tree up but she says Christmas wont be the same without him.

[slinky.kate]

i swore i would never get so attached to a dog again,but its still early days,

[Barmaid]

Slinky, I have some idea of how you feel. I lost my old lady in April aged 13 - this will be the first Christmas I can remember without her. I have so far resisted putting up the tree since she was the one who always used to destroy it. Even thought it was 8 months ago, I still have the odd tear for her.

[anneasquith]

get down to the rescue centres and give a dog a good home....you your son and a dog deserve it.

[alexanderd]

Its a very sad time Kate I have been there there but dont let it spoil your Xmas get down to the nearest shelter and let a puppy pick you. The right one will let you know and you will have many happy years together
love Alex

[dotty.]

It's been a rotten year hasn't it kate
This is my first Christmas without a dog in the house for 15 years and it has been tough but the two new cats are really helping. I have a framed photo of Bingo and Max here and I'll always miss them, still calling the cats Bingo! I know that I will not get another dog, the cats seem to have settled well and they are good company.

[slinky.kate]

thanks everyone,i will try and be more positive,i can only get a dog if my son wants another as i cant take it walks,only sit in the garden and i dont know if son is ready yet,its still to raw.

[shivvy]

Oh I feel for you. Isn't it a terrible wrench when our furry friends go?

I promise you that, nomatter how corny it might sound, time really does heal.
I don't mean that you end up forgetting them, but that you get to the stage where you are able to move on with happy memories.
Why not give yourself (or your son) a christmas gift of a photo album of all the photos of your old pal. You will realise that the vast majority of your time with Rex was so very very happy and that should give you both huge comfort.

I don't often encourage people to rush into getting another pet after they are bereaved but I would ask you to consider it. You say that you are not able to walk a pup but why not consider taking on a golden oldie from a rescue centre? They are usually unable to go for big romps and are therefore overlooked by families however they can really love a comfy sofa or lap to get a scratch while watching tv which might suit you?!

Wishing you a happy christmas whatever you decide.
And remember that, although I never met him, I'd bet a million quid that Rex wouldn't want you to be miserable for a single moment.

[brenda]

Oh slinky, am so sad for you at this time of year.Please try to make the best of things if you can for your son and yourself.You must miss your pal so much ,that you feel your heart is breaking.Time is a healer of all sad things, but it is never immediate enough and it can sometimes take an age to heal completely.

People offer loads of advice on how to handle grief , but only you can find the best way for you.For me when I lost my GSD after 11 years I was devastated, and the greatest comfort I had, and still do have is a photograph of him.Got a nice frame and have it on the table by my bed.
.That way I think he is still looking after me -- sloppy I know, but every night before I put the light out I hug my present dog, and say" goodnight old son" to my long gone faithful pal, remembering all the love he gave to me ,and how lucky I was to share his life.
Do I feel sad now -- only sometimes, mostly I think of him with warm affection and a smile.
I am sure that you will find a way to cope with your loss-- and the days will get easier.
Sincerely Brenda.

[lilacben]

kate, I know how you are feeling.I am still upset about my dear dog Amber who died in the night before I came home from holiday..(she was only 12 )....just a few hours later and I would had been with her.. That was on the 17th October. I do have a photo of her by my bed and always say good night to her. I would love to get another puppy but can;t as I have another dog and don;t think he will accept another one.He is 10 and was with her all his life. But I still miss Amber and her little ways, things that Ben doesn't do. Please think about another dog.....there are some poor little pups that badly need homes or older dogs. Think of the comfort you could give them at christmas....when they are all alone in kennels. Whatever you decide ,your dear Rex wouldnt want you to be sad and would most likely be pleased if you had another companion to love as much as you did him. take care xxxxxxxxxx

[masma]

We lost Jetspoon (my avatar), the best girl ever, in May, she was 14 and a true treasure. We'd had her since she was 18 months old, we were her 4th home. I really didn't want to get another dog so soon as the pain of losing Jet was too much, but... along came Coco. She too is 18 months old and a complete opposite of Jet - she's hard work but oh so funny. We give in to her too much but she had such a rotton start in life that we forgive her almost anything - rod and back spring to mind....
Try and think of all the happy times Rex brought to you - he wouldn't want you to be so sad. xx

[slinky.kate]

well i feel a little better today,my two boys and youngests girlfriend all got stuck in and cleaned and tidied the house,gave away dog food etc.my xmas tree is up and my lighty up santae(ha ha)got my pressies wrapped ,i made them a nice dinner and we had a happy day,the tree looks great and has cheered me up.thanks everyone for kind words and i wish you all a verrrrrry happy xmas.god bless,kate

[boxtops]

Kate, that is lovely news - how kind of everyone, and how it has made you feel a bit better. I understand how you've felt - so do we all - but you are lit up now. Enjoy your Christmas!

[lilacben]

Kate I was so so happy to read your message. A new day has bought you feeling so much better, for which I am glad of for you.! And your family. From now on take each day at a time and I am sure you will have a very happy christmas. with love to you. xxx

[wildwood]

I do feel for you kate. It is not much help now but it will get better with time.

Hope you feel better by Xmas. Do you have any small kids living around your area? Maybe you could buy a few small trinkets, wrap them and give them to the kids. Nothing heals like the smile of small children and it will make you feel a little bit better.

[shivvy]

So pleased to hear back from you again Kate, and delighted that you have had a better day. It will be up and down for a while - but it does get easier.
I hope you enjoy your christmas. Come on here anytime you feel the need to have a chat etc.

[slinky.kate]

thanks guys,i do feel a lot better,the first couple of weeks after he had gone i could still feel him in the house,but the last week i cant feel him anymore so i think thats stopped me mopping about,mind you he has only been gone since the 29th of november,i am feeling a lot stronger and it has helped talking to yous,sometimes you feel your the only one that feels so bad and tries to hide it,but i know the boys suffered as much,hope you all have a nice xmas &new year.kate x x x x x x