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Jomlett

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Jomlett
Bono, in an attempt to diversify his business income has released a new Satnav onto the market. It’s rubbish, the streets have no names and I still haven’t found what I’m looking for....
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...On Christmas Eve you open it to reveal the baby cheeses.
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Why can't Trump go to the White House anymore? Because it is FOR BIDEN....
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I went for a hearing test yesterday and the doctor said 'Can you describe the symptoms'? I said 'Yeah, Homer is a sort of yellow colour with bulging eyes'....
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What do you call a row of 10 rabbits jumping backwards? A receding hare line....
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Just had a painter and decorator round to do some work on the house. Turns out he's a currently furloughed British Airways pilot ... he's made a lovely job of the landing.
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A Team leader Hannibal Smith will take part in the next series of Celebrity Bake Off. He loves it when a flan comes together.
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I’m looking for some advice with a problem we have with persistent condensation in our house. You’re welcome to come over and have a look any time. The kettle’s always on....
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There's something that I don't like about "DO NOT TOUCH" signs. I just can't put my finger on it....
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https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EdIRc0rXsAAjYS9?format=jpg&name=large...
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Amazon sale's on. I ordered four Kindles and they sent me a Two Ronnies DVD.
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https://twitter.com/CandiceBenbow/status/1074010643592814592?s=19...
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https://www.itv.com/news/meridian/2018-12-14/parrot-fashion-rocco-orders-gifts-online/...
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A priest, a drunkard, and an engineer were all being led to the guillotine to be executed. They ask the priest if he wants to face upward or downward when he meets his fate. The priest says that he...
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https://www.bbc.co.uk/mediacentre/latestnews/2018/classic-drama-boxsets...
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https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-45154707...
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BBC News - BMW recalls 300,000 cars that risk stalling completely http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-44050686...
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BBC News - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-42144445...
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The boss of a Somerset bus company has taken his fleet off the road without warning and sent a note to staff saying: “I have had enough and realise I cannot work with you a moment longer.”...
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Why you shouldn’t buy Wowcher’s £179 MacBook http://www.which.co.uk/news/2017/09/why-you-shouldnt-buy-wowchers-179-macbook/...

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