self-worth

[Connemmara]

food for thought - does any of the ABers when they feel really low and negative and all the words associated with the above - feel a bit better when they go on to this site. Last year as you all know I was in a dark place but thanks to many of you I rode above it though tentatively - however, it is still lurking in there somewhere but when it rises I come to my oul "friends". Thanks ABers.

[Zacs-Master]

They're obviously not meaningless to Connemara. If it works....it works.

[Connemmara]

Rev I am not too bothered with cyber hugs either - we were discussing self-worth. Cyber hugs to me are like those "air kisses" you see with celebrities.

[Zacs-Master]

Oh, right.

[chaptazbru]

I would never post details on here if I was depressed, ill or fed up and I never respond to those sort of posts either. I don't know anyone on here personally and no-one knows me, so it seems a bit 'daft' to me. I have friends and family for all that, BUT each to their own. This is just my opinion.

[Connemmara]

Sorry Zacsmaster I know you were saying something nice.

[Connemmara]

Well Chapta - just to close this chapter - when I was coming to the bad time last year I could not function mentally and couldn't tell any of my friends so coming here was right for me at the right time. Bye all!!

[chaptazbru]

LIke I said, each to their own ........

[divegirl]

I turned to AB in my hour of need and I can't even begin to explain how much it helped me.
Having been a member for years I'm not sure why I decide to 'bare all' so to speak [ I think I may have been slightly inebriated at the time in my defence] but I was so lost I didn't know where else to turn.
Am I glad I did it...damn right I am. To know I had people thinking of me for however a small a moment added to the practical advice I received and the two really good real life friends I made, it was well worth it!

Lisa x

[Connemmara]

well done divegirl - now know somebody this site has helped.

[Zacs-Master]

That's OK Conn. teach me to read the posts correctly. Sometimes it's easier to talk to people who aren't you're family.

[albaqwerty]

exactly Zacs, family and friends are blinkered, insofar as they are involved in your life, an anonymous site can give you an outside view of things.
The cyber hugs and kisses can mean that the poster is just being empathic.

[divegirl]

Exactly chaptazbru... at 43 I am the matriarch of my little family and also a single mum, I couldn't go to my brother [my only family member] with my fears of dying as I'm all he has!
Just knowing I had this place as a somewhere to air my hopes and fears made things so much easier for me... it was a personal chapter in my life and one I ended up sharing, but I'm glad I did.

Lisa x

[chaptazbru]

Glad it worked for you Lisa, but it wouldn't for me.

Viv x

[Mamyalynne]

I tend not to post about a gippy tummy or a stubbed toe - but did reach out in the cold dark night, when at my lowest ebb. Did it solve or change the outcome ? No, but it made me feel less alone and somehow more able to cope. For that I give thanks.

[Connemmara]

Have been browsing on other postings and you have to hand it to lots of people particularly with recipes - they go to so much trouble in typing the ingredients and recipe of any food or drink one asks for. This is where people perhaps feel a little important that another person would do that for them. Your own friends sometimes would not be bothered going to all that trouble. Right?

[divegirl]

Again Con I think it's horses for courses.

That is what some come on here for, you only have to look at the dedication of some of our quiz masters and the turn over in that topic for proof of that.
Others have become drawn on to the 'family' that is chatterbank and those are of course going to be there for each other.
I'm a very solitary person with only three real friends and even those I don't see sometimes for week. Though they were there for me at my lowest times...it was a very different form of help I got from here.
We're all different and that's what can make this place very special. I'm just glad there are the sort that will spare a moment of their day to type a response...it can mean so much to a person and that is why I try to take time to reply to those in need when they reach out.

Lisa x

[Prudie]

I'd be the first to say there are some amazingly clever and helpful people on this site. I wasn't answering in respect of other topics but rather on other ABers helping one out of a dark place. I said in my first post that I can see it has really been of great benefit to some and I am genuinely glad of the support both you and Lisa have mentioned receiving. I'm very reserved in general though and I wouldn't feel comfortable doing it, that's all (and it certainly doesn't make me feel superior).

[bednobs]

have to agree with DG - when i was going through my daughter's stillbirth and my sons death, just writing it down really helped me to articulate what i was feeling, and therefore allowed me to deal with those thoughts and emotions because they were identified. I found it incredibly difficult to face anyone in real life except my husband, so the format of an internet forum suited me very well. In fact i wouldn't even go out into the garden for a few months, for fear of seeing the neighbours. With an internet forum, if you become overwhelmed, you can simply shut it down and go back to it when you are feeling stronger.
I was very scared, and while of course nothing anyone else could say could alter the outcome for either of them, even help with advice on the practical things - death certificate, choosing funerals etc was very welcome. And it made it all the sweeter when i announced the birth of my daughter, because in a way it felt like you had all been there with me through the darkest times

[anneasquith]

good post bednobs, i remember heather and william very well. and conn, its always nice to see you posting, and happier than last year, and if AB assisted you in your progress, that can only be a positive thing,