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Morris Dancing...

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craterface | 14:40 Fri 01st Jul 2005 | Body & Soul
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A friend has told me that because I have been circumcised I cannot participate at my local morris dancing club. Is this true?
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ummmmm......how would they find out?
-- answer removed --
morris dancing is based on an ancient fertility dance - so you probably couldn't do it if you'd had a vasectomy!

Morris dancing was originally Moorish dancing, according to the most common theory, which means it came from Spain during the time of the Moors - the Islamic rulers of the Middle Ages. Muslims are supposed to be circumcised, which implies that it's actually the uncut who should be banned.

But I think andy hughes is right (as usual).

I play the accordian for a Morris Dancing troupe and because of many unfortunate incidents with the accordian on my lap, it was found necessary to have the operation to stop this silly nonny nonsense once and for all.  So it's ok for the accordian player, but not Morris and his dancers.

As we say in our club, "Pull the other one, it's got bells on!"

This is actually a vulgar reference. The idea behind it is that only a complete (geddit?) - you supply an appropriate synonym for 'penis' - would participate in Morris dancing, anyway!
Surely quizzie that should have been "compleat"!
Quizmonster, that's AWFUL!
How many of us thought it though?

I first came across this during military service decades ago. The story went that a Captain was being interviewed and he was informed: "Why don't you do the promotion exams? You'd certainly get the superior rank if you did." He replied: "There's no point, Sir. I'm circumcised, you see." "What on earth do you mean? There's no religious prejudice in the Service!" "Oh, I know that, Sir, but you've got to be a complete" - here he supposedly used a five-letter word beginning with 'p' and ending with 'k' - to be a Major!"
The same attitude, I feel, applies to morris dancing!

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