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where do i stand?

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ddaisy992 | 00:04 Thu 13th Nov 2008 | Family Life
14 Answers
my ex alcoholic partner now wants Custody of my boys,!!i hav been a mother an fathes to then but dnow hes takin me too court. I am besides myself. Pleas help me
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what was i thinkin? I am making a appointment for a lawyer. Its a bolt from the blue took me offgaurd.
most likely, the odds are stacked in your favour, ddaisy.

but as you say, you need some legal advice. try not to panic.

best of luck x
Question Author
sara3, its come out of the blue when i am feeling like crap as well. I have a good lawyer who handled the seperation so going to phone for a meeting as soon as office opens.
daisy, try not to worry. Even in this day & age it would be uncommon for a father to gain custody in these sort of circumstances. Its easy to panic, especially if this has just been sprung on you, but trust in your lawyer and try to stay calm. No one will take your boys away xx
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my lawyers dealing with it all now, i did panic as he was slurrying his words when he phoned me.
Oh try not to worry!! it'll be fine I'm sure!!
I doubt he would ever get custody, unless your children are old enough to make the decision and state they wish to live with their father. Coupled with the fact he is an Alcoholic (you can't be an ex alcoholic as such, he's currently an alcoholic on the wagon) then the chances of him obtaining full custody is slim I would imagine.
He can be made to have a hair test, in which a hair from anywhere on his body will be analysed for excessive alcohol intake.
Is that right Tups? If so, that really puts my mind at rest too!
is he on their birth certificate as their father? if not he has no chance in law.

also, how could he do a job and support them and look after them, how can he afford a solicitor? he sounds an idiot.
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thanks you for the replys. Yes he is on both birth certifcates we were married, are married. We hav bn seperated over 2year but not divorced even though i call him my ex. He has monex, his dad is well off i take the boys too there papas evsy � wks.
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sorry got distracted. Every 2 weeks, i have a foot injury so cant drive so hav put off the next planned visit.
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If he is the father, he has every right to see his children and go for custody. If he is a recovering alcoholic, shouldn't that be a sign that he wants to sort his life out and put things right?
If you are married and not divorced he has exactly the same rights to see his children as you, unless a Judge has decreed otherwise. If he walks to your home and wants to see the kids, there's nothing you can do to stop him, legally. As your still husband and wife.

May I ask why is he applying for custody; and what the reason for the split was, as if it was infidelity he's pretty much lost everything.

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