What can an OT do for someone with depression?

[billbobaggin]

My partner has had depression for a long, long time. It wasn't untill i stopped working long hours that I realised the extent of his difficulties. he has medication, a psychiatrist, a CPN, even a short bought of CBT. I am really struggling to live with someone who takes no active part in the life of our family (we have a son 6). This week I know the cpn has visited for the first time with the OT. What would you suggest the OT will do with him (he wont tell me - if I'm honest I just cant listen any more).

[Marg0]

Once someone falls out of routine and becomes inactive, self-esteem and habits go too, the OT will try to rebuild these.
Can I be really frank?
Most OTs, psychotherapists, psychiatrists and especially nurses are totally sh!t at their jobs-sorry, that's the way it is. Most of them are jobsworths, especially on the NHS. Pay close attention to what the OT does, it may just be a load of bs.
One of the most important predictors of outcome for the depressed is social support. You could be the difference between pulling through, and not, for him. I know it is tough, but if you continue to be patient, it should reap rewards.
It's very difficult for most depressed people to open up and interact, but it depends on the type of depression he has, and what caused it (trauma, a purely endogenic brain chemistry malfunction, etc). What drugs did they give him? Does he have any other separate anxieties or problems that you know of?
Chin up love, hope it works out.

[cado]

he has no ambition.
what he need is to smoke a couple joints every day.

[mycats]

I have suffered from depression since I was 14 and trust me it is suffering.
I cant imagine what its like from your side though, my mum says its the helplessness that's the worst.

What medication is he on? I tried loads before I found one that worked for me.
He will be feel guilty that he hasnt done more for his son, please dont throw that in his face.
good luck, come on here and vent x

[billbobaggin]

Marg0 thanks, sadly I am not being particularly patient as it has worn very thin. However I havent gone despite wanting to. His social support is almost non existant. His depression is called something like low level depression I suspect its genetic and that he has always had it. He may even have aspergers (it would fit despite his protestations).

[Marg0]

yeah ok there are some med professionals that can help, my working experience of them has been pretty poor. It's not like you're dealing with an engineering or business problem, you're dealing with a cognitive/neuroscience or behavioural problem which is )*)(*)ng hard to work out and therefore &(*&(&g hard to treat.
IAP, sorry to hear about your depression. Did you get drugs/cbt for the BPD?

[billbobaggin]

thankyou - I am going to look at the links after which it might be good to talk for longer (in a pickle). Bear with me. I dont think its bi-polar - he has no highs - just long term misery :-)

[Bathsheba]

Ah billbo, my heart goes out to you both x

[stonekicker]

in some areas, community mental health teams employ cpn's as well as OT's to see people in their own homes. the OT will specialise in looking at motivation, behaviour change, life skills and self-confidence - all of which your partner is currently lacking (by the sounds of it). And Marg0 - if health professionals are so truly crap at their jobs, why are they usually the first port of call for just about everybody when things go t!ts up? or shall we just tell people to pull themselves up by their bootstaraps next time we see them - social support does have a role to play - but so does that of the professional, if the lay carers haven't got a clue what they're dealing with - who supports them?

[showcatbenga]

As I have a chronic low mood (depression) interspersed with extreme (suicidal) episodes I understand what your partner is going through. I've been this way for the last 20 years at least. I've been on & off anti-depressant medication for all this time - mostly on. Cognitive Behaviour Therapy is the 'new big thing' for treating depression in the NHS however although it is very effective for around 80% of depressed patients it doesn't work for everyone. I have done the computer based course of CBT at the GP's surgery & I have also attended a group course run by the psychology department at the local hospital. I wouldn't say they were useless because there are some very useful strategies to learn but this treatment did not 'cure' my depression. The OT will talk to him about wanting to change - his behaviour, the way he feels, etc. Together they will set some goals & challenge the cycles of behaviour that prevent him from achieving them. There are sometimes issues with anger, anxiety, guilt & low self-esteem which all handicap him & sabotage his chances of successfully completing anything. Try to think back to the time when he still did things & had interests, you can build on these to encourage him back into family life. Just go ahead & plan your activities with your son, invite your partner with no conditions - but point out that he used to enjoy 'it' (whatever) & it would really make both of your days if he came along...No guilt if he cannot. Keeping a mood & activity 'diary' can help, rating each mood 1 to 10. It will also show you that although slow he is making some progress towards recovery. This depression will never go away completely but you can choose to learn to manage your life & activities so you can stay in a better state of 'wellness'. Contact MIND they will help relatives & carers too.

[billbobaggin]

thank-you all. What can MIND do for me? I feel like I have gone past being in a position to help him emotionally any more. He has been ill for so long I struggle to be able to identify things that he has ever gained pleasure from. Meanwhile muggins has the responsibility of a stresful job, child, house, car and self. With someone who's contribution is non existant. Professionals I have sought support from say go - he wont change. But its not as easy as that is it. He's ill no income and wouldnt have the financial or emotional where with all to go somewhere else. He has no family and 'friends' have been unable to tolerate his behaviour and no longer exist. I find even posting this to have been difficult and exhausting.

[Segilla]

From my experience, you don't get better until you decide you want to get better. Meantime, it's important to develop an deep interest in somnethng completely foreign to your usual pursuits. In my case it was buying an old car and repairing it in the1950s.
This takes your mind off your self soul-searching.

Pick any topic, study of wild flowers, looking at buildings in the old pare of your town, (particularly above the first storey) and find out about their history, Go out and pick up litter.
Oddball maybe, but you must try something new.

[madmoo]

Living with someone who is depressed is depressing. i have lived with my husband for 10 years and he has always had it. There are good days but mainly bad days. i know how frustrating it is and i have four children as well. The only advice i have is to try to get on with your life around him. Keep yourself busy. Let him know that you are there and then just get on with it. It seems as if he is getting plenty of professional help so there is nothing more that you can do. Keep things as normal as possible for the sake of your son. Be prepared for the long haul. Don't be too hard on yourself either.You have to be a very strong person to put up with it too. Do not beat yourself up as you have a life too.

[TimothyJone]

http://www.depression-guide.com/depression-sup port.htm